[I don't believe we can resist the things that make no sense...]

[reenka]

You know, this is really odd-- kind of mind-boggling, even-- for me to admit, but: just because I don't -identify- myself with any social group or time period, (early lj) HP fandom included, it doesn't mean I'm not actually included.
    I mean, it annoys me so much when people say stuff like 'but why do you care about ancient history, you losers' partly for idealistic 'but history is important, asshole!!' sort of reasons, yeah, but the main reason is-- the main reason is that it's my history too. I was part of that fandom-- I was there, I knew these people, they knew (at least of) me, and I felt... I guess I felt I belonged. So it matters because I was enough of a loser to get involved and stay involved up till now, even though I haven't really 'moved on' in the sense of joining another fandom -or- really participating in the HP fandom as it stands. In that sense, I -myself- am a pointless remnant the same way some pointless story about old-time BNFs is.

I mean, I reread Bec's 'H(x)/D(x) = x^3 sec(x)' even though I couldn't care less about whatever 'goodfic' is going around H/D circles now, say-- and it means so much more to me than 'just a fic', because I read it back before I had a coherent idea of 'oh, it's intelli' or a 100% solid grasp of the H/D cliches it mentioned-- I read it raw and starry-eyed, not yet inured to the 'tricks' of fanfic or sharp little references to snarling boysex against a wall. And that sort of thing never seems to leave me. Now, I can almost tell what the 'real' fic looks like, trying to cut away my ancient bias like an appendix, but it won't... quite... go. I think it's still a good fic, but if you look at it now, you won't understand it, I think, what it -felt- like to read it for a style-whorish H/D-obsessed fangirl in 2002, because it was basically written the -very month- I started reading HP & H/D.

I mean, in the end, it was coincidence-- I just -happened- to have my first contact with H/D be eleveninches'/Durendal's website, and I just -happened- to read her generous links page to Aja & Ivy & Rhysenn & Penelope (the Veelas & various H/D + intelli associates, et al) immediately afterwards because Durendal was a Veela. So I saw-- I imprinted-- I fangirled. That's basically how it went.

And I ask myself now-- honestly-- would I care if this was some wank history about the Buffy fandom or even HP history I hadn't participated in, like something actually recent or from 2000/HP4GU-era? Probably not, you know? I wouldn't care how exciting/shocking the wank is, how the truth finally came out, whatever-- it only matters 'cause it ifluenced the course of what was once my fandom. My turf, y'know? Even though now that seems kind of funny and sad.

Comments

[scoradh.livejournal.com]

It's little, and it's broken, but it's mine? (Lilo and Stitch)

I guess I wouldn't be so slavishly interested either, if I didn't know who these people were. Not msscribe, but all the BNFs -- Aja and Cassie and Heidi. You're right, if it was some Buffy BNFs I wouldn't care -- although there seem to be parallel events in both LOTR and VM from what outside commenters have been saying. Goes to show, you meet the same kind of people everywhere.

The only thing this really confirmed for me is that fandom isn't really about good fanfic. It's a part of it, because I don't think (I don't know either, though) that copperbadge or mistful or amanuensis stooped to those levels to gain acclaim. But mostly it is about who you know and the power you wield and, basically, the size of your flist. Clearly I have been all wrong, trying to write better the last two years -- I should have splashed out on a few sockpuppets to praise me instead. ;) Except that for all I wish I had more praise, I want to come by it honestly. I can't even bring myself to rate my own fic on Skyehawke -- you know, the stars thing?

Phew, anyway, that was irrelevant. I think people have a right to know about the history of their fandom if they really care about it, which is why the 'ancient history' argument isn't cricket to me. People are implying that if you're a latecomer, you just don't deserve to know what happened before you arrived -- which is some cheek, imo.

And btw, you made a great impression on me way back when. I remember reading an 'Armchair' fic you co-wrote with Maya and I secretly fangirled you as much as I secretly fangirled her. You were held up in a lot of places as the voice of reason in the swamps of leather-clad sex-gods. I'm geekily flattered to be on your flist. ♥

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

Hahah, I cowrote a fic-- with Maya?? This makes me laugh, for I do not remember, but it's true that we were both on Armchair & there were fic challenegs, so... :-? Heh. I'm insanely flattered by the 'voice of reason' bit :D :D I wish! I'm more like the voice of fanon!Draco-obsessed delirium, but >:D <3 I'm glad for whatever small difference I made, definitely :D

It's true that mistful & amanuensis never stooped to those levels, but they also were the 'second wave' of writers, that came something like 2+ years after Aja & Ivy, y'know? The other thing is that they hung out with different people-- amanuensis hung out with the Snape & pron crowd, who were more -literally- wanky, and copperbadge was more affiliated with S/R, not that they ever had a big BNF gig like H/D did. So it's largely about the cliques of shippers and role-players, with Draco and early het/gen people becoming H/D or Draco/someone people dominating. It's true that Maya was the true exception to the rule-- she actually -was- in the clique (ie, friendly with Cassie, Aja, etc) and in the shippy/Draco segment of fandom, but non-wanky. In her case, partly it's that she never really took fandom seriously, never 'got involved' outside of chatting & writing fics, and also she was/is so amusing, she could become wildly popular just by breathing. Though that's my not-entirely-unbiased opinion :>

So yeah, a lot of people were famous for fics in fandom without being wanky BNFs, but that's 'cause they weren't -really- at the center. I mean, you have to have written a certain -kind- of fic (H/D or before that, H/Hr 'cause all the smarties at the FA cliques didn't like R/Hr-- that's for those boring Sugar Quillers), plus you had to have written it at the right time, when fandom was small enough. Back in the day, everyone read the 'new fic', especially if a friend recced it, and you -could- conceivably follow nearly every H/D WIP of note. So I do think it was about the fics, actually, because even -I-, what with my measley little shortfics that didn't pander much & lack of WIPs-- even I got noticed then way more than I would now. And by noticed I don't mean 'comments' but rather 'people knowing my name'-- 'cause it's like, people could give you more comments now in the comms or wherever (whereas back then, in '02, even BNFs got something like 10 comments on lj), what with all the newsletters, but people actually knowing you for your fic these days-- not so likely.

It's true that there are similar types of stories elsewhere, because I know of at least -several- similar sagas within that -same period- in HP alone :)) It really was a whole load of inbred wank, really :>

[scoradh.livejournal.com]

I'm sure you did! I can still remember it. I hope I'm not wrong now, but sure ... meh.

Yes, I suppose I mean 'quality' of fic, not 'fic', but then one has to assume that nowadays a lot of quality fic gets missed and maybe that's just not true. Maybe there is a limited amount you can do with all of this and it's been exhausted now.

The whole 'involvement' issue is kinda scary. I could see myself getting too involved if I wasn't so forcibly grounded in RL issues; my college course never lets up on pressure and RL wank.

I always did think it was funny that S/R shippers never had a real BNF. Perhaps because honestly, the ship has so little scope -- what with one of the partners being dead and in the majority out of commission. Hmm. Obvs, the WIPs make or break authors, but nowadays people are shy of reading them.

What to do, what to do? I reckon I should move on to House fic, because I should surely have an advantage there -- in the medical terminology, I mean. :) But I'm so comfy in this fandom. I don't want to write proper stuff, because I tried and OMG, it was complete self-insertion! I totally couldn't divorce myself enough ... perhaps the next Pirates film will whip up some interest.

Cabin fever, perhaps? ;)

[zedmeister.livejournal.com]

Yes, I suppose I mean 'quality' of fic, not 'fic', but then one has to assume that nowadays a lot of quality fic gets missed and maybe that's just not true. Maybe there is a limited amount you can do with all of this and it's been exhausted now.

There's a grain of truth to that, in that it does seem like most of the stuff being written today has all been done before. But nobody is really putting a lot of effort into it, anyways. It's much easier to write a "draco is a goth veela who cuts himself and runs off into the sunset with harry who has cigarette burns and was raped by vernon at the age of two and a half only to be rescued from the evil clutches of dumbledore by snape" fic than a thoughtful exploration of canon. Unfortunately. I mean, look at how low the Bing Bang turnout was.

OK< I'll stop spamming lunacy's journal now.

[scoradh.livejournal.com]

Yup, I know, I did BB both times. :)

Not to be snarky, but in the interest of discussion, what exactly do you mean by 'thoughtful exploration of canon'? Personally (and I can't make a point without bringing myself/my writing into it, I'm self-centred like that), I do take trouble with my fics and have never written about cutting, burning, raping or veelas. I try to avoid fandom cliches, points of great irritation to discerning readers etc, but mostly I just write what I want.

The point I want to make is that for me, fanfic was about supplying the relationships lacking in canon. JK is an adventure fantasy writer, not a romantic novelist. However, I read the books from a romance reader POV. There was never enough romance for me; so my fic is always about relationships. I don't think I'm alone in that. So, by 'canon exploration', do you mean 'The life and times of Mundungus Fletcher' or 'more carefully crafted fics along the lines of ___ in the time of ___"?

Er?

It's late, I may be making a mountain out of a molehill here. :)

[zedmeister.livejournal.com]

I know you did BB, you made me cry ;)

So, by 'canon exploration', do you mean 'The life and times of Mundungus Fletcher' or 'more carefully crafted fics along the lines of ___ in the time of ___"?

Well, both really, as long as it's well-written. I don't think that fics have to be some sort of extension of meta, if that's how you understood my use of "exploration". I just meant that that whether they build on canon (like relationship fics, or future fics, or whatever) or reinterpret it (like AUs and mindfuck fics), good fics should still be *based* on canon, and not toss it out at the author's convenience, you know?

[zedmeister.livejournal.com]

So I do think it was about the fics, actually, because even -I-, what with my measley little shortfics that didn't pander much & lack of WIPs-- even I got noticed then way more than I would now. And by noticed I don't mean 'comments' but rather 'people knowing my name'

I think you're rihgt about this, in that there were fewer fics being written back then and people paid more attention to them. But people also paid more attention to *quality*, too. The stuff that's being churned out by many 'popular' authors these days simply screams PLEBE, but there's no one to point it out anymore. For example, I still remember the first line of one of your fics - "All Hallow's Eve and even the ghosts are subdued." - and that was because they were well-written, if unpolished.

But there was more to it, too. People knew your name because of the brilliant reviews you left, and in such a characteristic style :D There was a lot more interaction and squeeing and *love* for the fics being written than there is now. Most of the stuff written today is so out of character, you could exchange "Harry" and "Draco" for "Bob" and "Dylan" and there would be no difference - and nobody cares. Fics are becoming popular based on certain content that appeals to the masses, not on originality or style. And really, when you think about it, there aren't many people actively writing in H/D fandom today who could be called BNFs - furiosity, maybe, or jennavere, and I'm sure there are hordes of fans who haven't even heard of them.

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

Hahah I find it vaguely hilarious that most people (if they remember me) remember me for that Armchair Halloween fic. Well, I -did- actually polish it (it was my only beta'd fic! heh... ahhh, I felt so special for having a beta, but then I don't trust most people to beta me and/or they're too busy with... uh... writing and/or a real life, etc). I don't know who (besides me!) obsessively wanked on about H/D fic quality, and in my case, I don't know who cared enough to listen to me, in the larger scheme of things :)) (which is why I stopped.) I mean, back in '02-03, sure, the people writing it were the people who cared-- like, Penelope and Slytherlynx and Ivy would have conversations about aspects of H/D writing (there's actually an ancient post like that on Penelope's deadjournal that I found once to my absolute joy). But yeah.. the writers don't care so the readers don't.

It probably -was- about the reviews, come to think of it~:)) I actually forgot(!) how obsessively I feedbacked everyone. Well, it's in my nature to ramble on about the things I'm interested in :>

Ah well, the truth is, the 'big' fics were never actually all that IC or great in an objective sense (like with Bec's fic-- I can't even tell you how 'good' it is in real terms). We were just more geekily invested... now it seems more like inertia. And the fact is, there are no 'big' fantasy/sci-fi shows like Buffy or X-Files or Star Trek to grab our attention, so all the fandoms seem fractured and pointless 'cause basically TV sucks and people have become mercenary and it seems like they'll just watch any old thing. Plus more (non-genre, 'normal' aka dumb) people are online/on lj/discovering fandom in general now. Heh.

Oh well, good thing I'm not fannish by nature & can always go back to solitarily reading good fantasy books that people still actually do produce :>

[zedmeister.livejournal.com]

Ah well, the truth is, the 'big' fics were never actually all that IC or great in an objective sense (like with Bec's fic-- I can't even tell you how 'good' it is in real terms). We were just more geekily invested... now it seems more like inertia.

Yeah, I've lost count of how many people I've heard wonder what the big deal was with IP or the DT - although Maya's stuff remains universally popular :D But like I said below, a lot of those fics *were* very good.

Bec's fic, for example, never makes me want to cringe the way some of the older stuff does when I reread it. It's actually one of the fics I plan to rec one day (in the distantdistant future), when I finally get off my fat ass and type up the Fics I Have Loved post I've been planning for years now. Like that line, "seventh year seventeen year-olds, NC-us", that was *genius*. (I think that's how it goes. I'm trying to make the point that it's engraved in my memory, but it'll be hilarious if I got it wrong :D I don't want to cheat and look it up, though.) Anyway, that line is fandom in a fucking poetic nutshell. It hasn't lost any power since it was written.

Oh well, good thing I'm not fannish by nature & can always go back to solitarily reading good fantasy books that people still actually do produce :>

That's what I thought, too! Until I read THIS (http://www.intergalacticmedicineshow.com/cgi-bin/mag.cgi?do=columns&vol=carol_pinchefsky&article=008):

However, [Jane S.] Fancher [a SF/fantasy author] also sees fan fiction as a potential threat, and not just because of copyright abuse. She believes readership of novels may be declining in part because of time spent reading on the Internet. "Look how much fan fiction is being written. There are only so many readers with only so much time to read. Our careers might well be on the line because of it."

It's a lose-lose situation! aaaaahhh!

[plumforgot.livejournal.com]

I think it's still a good fic, but if you look at it now, you won't understand it, I think

I think that holds true for a vast deal of fic written pre-OotP. A lot of newbies these days don't even understand what "Intellislash" actually was, and who the Intellislashers were. When you look at Intellislash these days, you're like, WTF? It is really a product of its time. As was, say, Daisychain!Draco. That doesn't hold up now because the issues are old, but at the time it came out, it was unique and insightful and shocking (if I do say so myself). You can't really read most old beloved "classics" and have them hold up like they once would have.

I find it really ignorant when people profess not to care about fandom history (oldbies, classic fics, fads like Intellislash, ancient wank), or say things like "but why do you care about ancient history, you losers," because the fandom is what it is today because all of this "ancient history" shaped it and made it this way, no matter what corner you're in. I never, ever was on the het side of the fandom by any stretch of the imagination and can't name the players, but I still recognise the importance of the GT/SQ/Harmonian stuff; I still felt the riptide. Just because someone wasn't around for the first cry of "H/D is dead!" doesn't mean that the fic they are reading and writing doesn't unconsciously incorporate times like that in the fandom.

If people want to not care, then whatever, they can just swim along in their own drool - but to ask other people, "Why the hell do you care?" like all this is just celebrity gossip that doesn't affect anyone is just downright ignorant, in my opinion.

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

Man, I remember reading Daisychain!Draco and -I- was definitely shocked by it, to the point of -disturbed- and slightly scared :)) I think there'll always be people who discount the value of context-- I mean, you see people who were -there- (like, ari_o & flourish) who basically say they don't care anymore 'cause it's all water under the bridge... and the fact is that I just don't work like that. But then I'm a overly-dwelling-and-fixating weirdo, I guess, even if I acknowledge literary/social history is important in its own right.

I think there are people who just... um... get over things easily and also don't identify with the person they were 'way back then'. Like how people say 'I'm a different person now'. In a way, I feel so resentful towards them 'cause it's like they don't get me & what matters to me at all, but at the same time I guess I don't get -them- at all either ^^;;;;

[zedmeister.livejournal.com]

A lot of newbies these days don't even understand what "Intellislash" actually was, and who the Intellislashers were. When you look at Intellislash these days, you're like, WTF? It is really a product of its time. As was, say, Daisychain!Draco.

But a big part of this is also the fact that nobody really *talks* about these things anymore. I remember in 2003 or so, every newbie *had* to learn what Intellislash was, what t00b meant, and so on, because these terms were simply part of the fandom vocabulary. Say what you will about Aja, she was reinforcing the H/D community with practically every post she made. Everywhere you turned, people were discussing these fics, squeeing over them or wanking about them. Nowadays, it's a rare HP fan who even knows what BNF means, let alone the old fandom-specific terms.

You can't really blame them, though. It's not just that most of the old fans left the fandom; most of the major archives are gone or abandoned, and Yahoo has deleted most of the old mailing lists. Veela Inc is gone, the PSA still isn't back to what it used to be, and the new sites - The Silver Snitch, for example, have no SOUL to them :D There's simply no place for the newbies to learn about The Way Fandom Was, even if they wanted to. Which, I'll grant you, most of them don't seme to want to, but still.

Also, the old fandomers were too good at covering their tracks after they left HP. For example, I have no idea who you are. :D There's simply no way to get in touch with most of them again.

I don't think the old classic fics have necessarily lost their meaning or value, though, especially the ones that were more character- than plot-driven; they're just lost in the ocean of fics written since then. Every now and then someone makes an effort to rec them again, but that doesn't do much to ensure their visibility.

The fandom has simply grown too big and lost cohesion. There are very few focal points today, be they BNFs or archives or recslists. IMO, the nature of livejournal is partly to blame for that, since everything has becomed short-lived and transient. Fics zoom by on the communities and only attract attention if they're multiparters, meta is discussed briefly and then consigned to the author's memories, rarely to be rediscovered by someone who wasn't originally present to read it. That makes me sad, since I'm still nominally in fandom but don't really have time to check my flist anymore, and I find that there's no ther way to keep track of what's going on.

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

Hahah, it's really kinda pathetic that my response to this is-- I'd really want to do something about all this... if only I cared >.<;;;;

Back in the day, I actually joined Veela Inc as a reccer, but never finished my big project anyway, so what can I say~:) I'm not even sure -what- would be currently worth preserving-- and besides, back in the day there -were- websites/mailing lists, I immediately added the author's ljs so I could keep track of them here 'cause I thought it was easier, all on one flist rather than scattered across bookmarks. The grass is always greener, y'know :>

[plumforgot.livejournal.com]

You can't really blame them, though.

I can't blame them for not knowing, and I wasn't - I was just saying that disregarding what other people find important, whether it's fandom history or personal history, is ignorant. In a universal context, not just a fandom one.

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

Uh... looking at the bright side of life, wanted to share:
You'd probably like this (http://community.livejournal.com/serpentinelion/29746.html) in spite of (because of) the Muggle AU schoolboy weirdly endearing fightpr0n... thing (featuring Very Very Gay Yet Somewhat Repressed!Draco, basically my favorite... though that's neither here nor there) :D Or you may utterly hate it, in which case DON'T HURT ME, I MEAN WELL :(

[plumforgot.livejournal.com]

LMFAO. I read it a while ago, but I don't think it had much of an impact on me... I do always love some repressed!Draco though!!

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

Hahah my main impact was 'hey, it's the first newish H/D I randomly read in months and months and I DIDN'T HATE IT' which is positive all in itself, y'know! Heh. Also I thought it was hot (hotter than like... well, unhot things *cough*mostoftherestofthecomm*cough*) ^^;;;
(Wheee, icon <3~!)

You know, my only real motivation to write H/D that I have left is for whoever I'm friends with that may want it ^^; In this case, it just reminded me of the 5th year AU I still wanna write for you, what with the Room of Requirement and good old Cedric-angstying-yet-horny!Harry :)) You've probably forgotten by now :>

[plumforgot.livejournal.com]

And here's me, still fantasising about H/D before I fall asleep last night :)) I'm totally unable to write anything, though, even for other fandoms. But I think you've noted before that I just get into funks like that.

I seriously want this 5th year AU :( Wasn't there supposed to be a tiara involved? Maybe I am thinking of something else...

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

This is going to sound weird, but... even though I generally don't fantasize about H/D anymore on my own, I just noticed that the H/D pr0n in that fic punched me in the gut a lot harder (and faster? this is really sounding dirty now) than any other kind of yaoi/pr0n I've seen since. Like, from the first bit of sudden arousal between them, I'm just hooked in that much more, like I'm right there all the way (like, I can -feel- it)and I'm not just watching them. Uh. I don't know if that even makes sense ><;; :))

Well, see, that's the sort of thing that makes me seriously driven to write! You wanting it, I mean, plus it not being haaaaard like my eeevil novella (I'm telling you, it's HORRIFYING trying to make post-HBP!H/D have sex-or-the-plot-gets-it in this day and age... why, I remember in the good old days all you needed was a potion... AND LET ME TELL YOU RIGHT NOW I'M TEMPTED). Omg, omg HAHAHA DO YOU THINK??! No, that would be too lame. Too lame, too lame. Noooo, bad!Reena, no sex-potions in serious drama DE!Draco fics, noooo (BUT WHY NOT AAARGH I LOVE IT NOOO DISSUADE ME NOOOOooooo... -.-) It would be fun, though. Perhaps I can tie it to Voldemort, AHAHAHAHALKFJSlakjfalks *cries*

Anyway, yes, I believe there was a tiara on that old bust in the Room in the actual canon illustration? Maybe. I think the 'plot' is that they get stuck in the RoR and get drunk while singing silly songs :))

[plumforgot.livejournal.com]

It makes sense! That's half of what I even need to enjoy H/D -- I mean, I can enjoy the most awful of H/D purely on the merit that the concept of arousal between Harry and Draco works for me. I don't really require CONVINCING, which is what a lot of fics strive to do...

Oh man Reena. I want this fic. I need this fic...!!!

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

I was actually thinking-- my favorite type of H/D arousal is both sudden and inexplicable. Like, they're both going 'WTF??!' but can't help it and can't explain it to themselves (which is why I'm attracted to saying 'fuck it' and going with a potion) but really you don't need a potion either. It's like... not the most canon-conscious of approaches, but you -can- do it in shorter fics (damn my longfic...ness!). Especially what with the being angry and nekkid and in the showers... or possibly stuck somewhere like a closet... or that one fic (IP I BELIEVE) where it was some sort of... wardrobe/coffin/thingie. It's really crack on a stick, that's why it's classic :D

[blacksatinrose.livejournal.com]

That whole history lesson was seriously fascinating. I came into HP fandom in 2003, so I remember... I guess the ending edge of some of that stuff (just like I remember Veela Inc and Intellislashers, but I wasn't around when they were really big deals, just when they were sort of remembered as formerly active big deals, if you know what i mean).

Anyway, so I'm a history geek and I'm sort of shocked at the idea that it doesn't matter. Not only does it matter because it's interesting, it also explained a lot of the situation in HP fandom when I joined, and the situation I see even now lingering on my flist even though I'm not really in it anymore.

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

I think with me it's even weirder in some ways 'cause I came in early enough but I didn't -know- people closely so much as read their fic. I sort of follow fandom wanks/wars/kerfuffles, but I was never -that- interested in who was friends with whom, really... so in a way it feels distant, like I was never really part of that fandom, and in a way that -was- what I read. I'm like... fic!social or ficcishly social or... ficcishly fannish or something, haha. Like, I wasn't friends with the Veelas, I just squeed about their fics a lot. If I didn't read the H/D stuff (and was into S/R, say), I don't know -what- fandom would've looked like to me, were I to be in it at the same time or earlier. Probably really different. What I mean is, even living through these events seems different depending on what you focused on at the time.

But yeah, it explains a lot. I was mostly ignorant as a day-old puppy in retrospect, licking everyone's faces and yapping happily, tail wagging at all the fics. I thought everyone was so -cool-, y'know? Haha so in that sense I'm like MsScribe if she wasn't all that snarky, wasn't outgoing, wasn't power-hungry or... okay we're nothing alike, but anyway :))

[blacksatinrose.livejournal.com]

Oh hell yeah. Most of the EVENTS had to do with either the het-shipper portion of fandom (R/Hr vs. H/Hr, duuude, although funnily enough most of the MsScribe stuff mostly revolved around Harry/Ginny) or the Harry/Draco portion which, of course, I was never really involved in. But it's been interesting because even just since I came... you know, when I first came into HP fandom, the BNFs still... existed? In the sense that, even though I was into the R/S area, there were certain people you just knew, most of which were H/D authors - you had Cassie and Aja and Ivy and... Rhysenn? people like that.

Now, notsomuch. I do think fandom has lost its tendency to conglomerate around beacons of activity. Whether that's a good or bad thing is arguable, but there aren't any BNFs in the way there used to be, not at all.

...Yeah you're nothing at all like Msscribe, HAHAHHA. I was thinking, while reading that, that that's the kind of thing I'd do if I weren't so apathetic about fandom status. And she was better at it than most although I'm not convinced it would work if someone tried it today just because part of the reason it worked for HER was that the first thing she did was construct an impenetrable armor against attacks in the form of BNF approval.

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

It is -so- freaky to think that H/D-ers 'ruled' over all the other slash ships. SO. WEIRD. >.> I think it's a similar feeling to living in America & theoretically knowing that people out there in -all- other countries emulate/listen to/curse/are -aware- of us even though we usually do none of these things for them. I mean, HP is like that within all fandoms (loud, dominating & insular) and H/D was like that within HP slash, which is a bit... wtflakjfslkfjs;lkfjdsfl;kj y'know? heh.

Hahaha man, you-as-misscribe is sort of scary. But I can't picture you doing the troll thing 'cause it's just so... grade-school with the insulting-the-lowest-common-denominator? I dunno. Though I can see where you'd be good at manipulating people if you bothered ^^;;;

[blacksatinrose.livejournal.com]

It's true, it's true, and that's actually a very good comparison.

AND YOU ARE RIGHT, I... don't think I could take myself seriously HAVING FLAME WARS WITH MYSELF. Although I roleplay with myself all the time? I mean I think part of it would require you to think of fandom as a big chessboard/some other game instead of really thinking about the fact that there are other people involved. Which is why, I guess, people keep saying it shows a near sociopathic level of manipulativeness and amorality, although I tend to think of it more as Narcissism or Hysterial PD. But I took psychopathology like, a while ago so I couldn't really swear I'm remembering the definitions correctly.

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

...When you said that about roleplaying with yourself, I thought... hahaha I do that all the time! When I write! *snorfle*



....btw, the Lucifer comic is still Very Good :9