(...why no) woe?

[reenka]

You know, it just struck me that I've yet to find a fic or manga that has anything I could term 'bisexual angst'. I mean, there's 'omg, no, I'm gay and I like someone I could never have' angst and there's the regular old 'omg boys/girls drive me INSANE yet I like one, woe!' angst... well, there's a bunch of variants, but. Point being, bisexuals always seem to be portrayed as being free spirits for whom gender doesn't matter-- either in a slutty way or just in a really 'enlightened' way, and that sort of... annoys me, actually. Not least because in my own experience, at least, gender does matter in terms of attraction, even if you like -both-; there's still that intrinsic difference between both and either, right? (Though yes, I realize both are different types of bisexuality; it's just that I see one represented and not the other.)

I mean, sure, everyone knows it's rude and un-PC to perpetuate the bi-slut stereotype, but the whole 'uncommon wisdom' shtick can also seem oppressive, in a way, simply because it doesn't recognize that we -all- have the same kind of identity crises and self-questioning at some point. Yes, even straight white male quarterbackers in the Midwest can question themselves sometimes, I'm sure.

In other words, in fanfic and manga-- and even in general media-- I find that whenever bisexuals aren't -invisible-, they're... kind of dismissive and/or dismissed-- like, oh, they're bi, so that whole angst you-the-pov-character are having doesn't apply.

I mean, I can easily see a character having -more- confusion because wow, they're attracted to -both- and it's easy enough to have -no- clue what you want in that case. What if Harry was bi, and therefore liked -both- Ginny and Draco in 'that' way, for instance?

...I dunno. Maybe that was my rare sudden burst of bisexual angst or... something. :/

Comments

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

I guess, yeah-- the whole free-spirit thing doesn't work if it's... not a free spirit, I guess, and even then, it's not really a question of enlightenment, I think. On some level, I dunno if it's -possible- to ignore gender markers for most people who think they do, even (like, I suspect they're lying to themselves). On another level, it's so intuitive to me that we like -certain things- about the people we like, yeah-- they don't even have to be visual, but something like 'I like the way girls smell' is already differentiating.

I haven't thought of it in terms of gender performance, but that's part of it too! I mean, for me it's -everything-, I couldn't pick something specific I like about girls because I like -everything- (smell, look, the way they talk, etc). I think love/attraction by nature is specific-- you like everything but at the same time you love the million little things that obsessive attention shows you. If you -don't care-, then it seems like you don't really like that thing/person. To me, at least~:)