~~everyflavor.
Sep. 6th, 2002 08:23 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
reenkacan never decide-- do i want to be beautiful, or just lose myself in beauty. do i feel bad that i don't produce things that feel better than orgasms (as far as art), or do i just want to wallow in the endless orgasmic art of others...?
am at lab, consulting. this girl-- comes up, to ask me a question. i'm like, shy and i can't believe i actually talk to people (as far as a "job", if you can call it that)-- all kinds of people-- without even acting like a complete dork. this last girl....
yea.
she leans over the counter. she's blonde, she's slender, she looks like buttercup, and she has huge guileless blue eyes-- and of course, cleavage. she looks me straight in the eye, and says something. like i'm a person. like, a normal person. that she would ever notice. and i mean, ever. i think this a lot. these people would never talk to me. and yet, here they are. acting like i exist-- like i'm normal-- like anything. existing is a kick. oh....yes.
i must sound pathetic, but oh well.
it's not like i want fame. it's not like i want attention, even-- well-- not the kind of attention that being that girl would give me. so... do i want her, or what she has? and what if it's neither. she's just-- a princess. and i always wanted to be something-- a princess, a fool, a knight, a rogue-- something.
being in her presence for like, 3 minutes, made me feel more alive. happier. looking into someone's eyes, and having them be look back-- without any romantic connotation-- just-- it's like, they see you. it's a thrill.
especially if the person who's seeing you is drop-dead gorgeous of course :>
drop dead fred. i liked that movie a lot.
i always had this need-- for years now, anyway-- to be around the brilliance i come in random, small contact with. all those writers-- all those artists-- all the people i find beautiful inside or out.... it's painful knowing they're there, but never having them know you are there, too. hm. well. pointless entry, but hey.
~~
oh...
my...
god...
*dies*
i just thought, "life is just a box of bertie bott's everyflavor beans".
aaaaargh *runs away, screaming, having resurrected*
that is all.
am at lab, consulting. this girl-- comes up, to ask me a question. i'm like, shy and i can't believe i actually talk to people (as far as a "job", if you can call it that)-- all kinds of people-- without even acting like a complete dork. this last girl....
yea.
she leans over the counter. she's blonde, she's slender, she looks like buttercup, and she has huge guileless blue eyes-- and of course, cleavage. she looks me straight in the eye, and says something. like i'm a person. like, a normal person. that she would ever notice. and i mean, ever. i think this a lot. these people would never talk to me. and yet, here they are. acting like i exist-- like i'm normal-- like anything. existing is a kick. oh....yes.
i must sound pathetic, but oh well.
it's not like i want fame. it's not like i want attention, even-- well-- not the kind of attention that being that girl would give me. so... do i want her, or what she has? and what if it's neither. she's just-- a princess. and i always wanted to be something-- a princess, a fool, a knight, a rogue-- something.
being in her presence for like, 3 minutes, made me feel more alive. happier. looking into someone's eyes, and having them be look back-- without any romantic connotation-- just-- it's like, they see you. it's a thrill.
especially if the person who's seeing you is drop-dead gorgeous of course :>
drop dead fred. i liked that movie a lot.
i always had this need-- for years now, anyway-- to be around the brilliance i come in random, small contact with. all those writers-- all those artists-- all the people i find beautiful inside or out.... it's painful knowing they're there, but never having them know you are there, too. hm. well. pointless entry, but hey.
~~
oh...
my...
god...
*dies*
i just thought, "life is just a box of bertie bott's everyflavor beans".
aaaaargh *runs away, screaming, having resurrected*
that is all.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2002-09-06 09:18 pm (UTC)You rock. I know what you mean, how sometimes it's so easy to just look at the world sometimes it's hard to be a part of it, or believe you ever could. But I think you're cool, from what I've read about you, and you're obviously a really bright person and you have a lot to make people interested in you.
Plus, I am forever indebted to you for linking to <a href="http://london.cowparade.net/cow/large/1254/>Harry Potter as a cow</a>. That's now the wallpaper on my computer. (He's been christened "Dairy Potter." *rolls eyes*) And also, was wondering if I could steal the phrase "[blank] rocks my sweet sweet world," from your info? Not sure what blank should be yet, but it would make a good icon, if you didn't mind. ^_^
no subject
Date: 2002-09-07 12:29 am (UTC)i um, kind of have no clue why some people add me, or how they find me, but it's all good, y'know. shocking, even. adds a little mystery if they don't explain. i can just imagine that it's like, something weird & random & maybe to do with my liking `the princess bride'... hmmm...
i'm so glad dairy!harry could brighten your life *snerks*
and, i think i stole "sweet sweet world" from somewhere, or maybe it's just a variation of the many "this rocks my adj/adj noun" type things, so you're welcome to it~:)
that anyone comments, ever, is really amazing to me, so um. yeah. it's never too late to make my day~! hee~:)
um. that cow was disturbing... those udders... *shudders* hee
~reena