[but who said good writers get laid, anyway?]

[reenka]

It appears I'd upset a friend when he'd wrote a poem to me (but not about me... er) years ago, and I laughed (though I don't remember it) and/or was harsh about critiquing it, and er... he'd apparently never wrote me a poem again after that -.- I know this because he wrote his current girlfriend one and she loved it (in that OMG NO ONE HAS EVER DONE THIS FOR ME, IT'S SO DEEP AND MEANINGFUL ZOMG!!1 sort of way) and he read it to me to check if she was biased or it was really amazing, ahahaha -.- Well, I mean, it wasn't -bad-, but... okay, a bit hokey, but with good imagery at times, and... somehow I feel I'm missing the point. He also said the cheesy first line about her tears and eyes, etcetc, was meant to press a button & was personal. (...Okay....)

This got me to thinking about how I am with fanfic in general too-- especially harsh with my closest friends, all that jazz, and also how I refuse to give the whole "it's personal to me" or "it's just for my/your pleasure" philosophy the time of day (in that whole 'if you're not perfectionist about your pleasure, that's not -my- problem' sort of way). I mean, I really -should- care about your (general 'your') pleasure and yet, somehow I don't. Haha, I care about -my- pleasure, and my pleasure is (what I see as) good writing, and I'm just rather an uncompromising bitch about that. -.-

I don't know what my point is. I feel bad that he's felt bad about my being harsh that one time, but not bad enough not to be unapologetic on some level. I mean, I don't -lie-, basically-- if it's great, I'm sincere. If it's not-so-great... I'm also sincere. And yeah, so maybe I'm a bit masochistic in reading the things that hurt my soul in the first place, but on the other hand, I still feel 'don't like it, don't read it' is a cop-out-- how would I know it's not good before I read it? And how do I know it's not good until I read a good bit of it, in fact...? And then, once you've invested that bit of your time-- well, you get to be bitter, is what I'm saying. You get to be very very bitter. ^^;
    If people hated me for this, I suppose I'd become even more antisocial than I already am, that's all, but I think(??) most people who know me take it as just me being me, or something.

Still, excusing cheesy lame lines as being 'personal' just strikes me as hilarious. As if -every- story, -every- line, -every- word in -every- creative thing you write shouldn't be personal. Duh. That's no excuse for being a shitty writer, though it -is-, in fact, something that will get you laid, I guess.

Oh, and did I mention feedback? It will also get you feedback. ('Bring me the cheese, if you please,' the masses cry. 'Oh yes, thank you,' they add. 'We will adore you and be your slave now, kthnxbi.' 'Tis the way of the world, methinks....)

Comments

[http://users.livejournal.com/_inbetween_/]

'don't like it, don't read it' is a cop-out-- how would I know it's not good before I read it? And how do I know it's not good until I read a good bit of it, in fact...? And then, once you've invested that bit of your time-- well, you get to be bitter
That is completely true.

But you can't apply that to poems written to you by a lover, of course *pokes* Not that I didn't have a similar reaction when a friend complained about the gf of her friend who had snubbed the drawing he had made of said gf, while my friend thought it was better than a bought present.
It does seem like a test of the relationship actually.
But. Different to fanfic.

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

Hahaha, I, um, just can't be like, 'oh, that's nice' or whatever-- it's not in me to be genuinely impressed and 'it's the thought that counts'-- uh, well, if someone made me fanart and/or wrote me a fic for my birthday, say, I'd be happy and not crit it harshly, but at the same time all my friends are pretty good writers, so.... -.-;;;;

I mean, yeah, you're right, it's not fanfic because... I'm, er, actually harsher on poetry than fanfic... can't help it... Or at least, I can't easily be genuinely touched by bad poetry no matter who it's from. I've been spoiled by actually only really falling in love for real with a poet, so.... -.-;;;;;

[http://users.livejournal.com/_inbetween_/]

Is it possible to be with someone who gives you bad poetry? Coz ... if he's perceptive, he'll know his limits and either the poem will have "something", or he won't do it. So, I still think it's indicative of relationships if gifts like that don't work.

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

Well, with this particular boy... he wasn't known for knowing his own limits-- though it wasn't a gift so much as, I dunno, somehow inspired by me...? The actual poetboy I loved never wrote me anything while we were together-- though he wrote oodles afterwards, ahahah, in typical poetboy style. I found one cruising the web once -.-;;; But yeah, -I- was the one who wrote -him- stuff while we were together, mostly without showing him. The one I -did- show him was... really bad, ahahah, and I knew it -.-; But that wasn't either; I don't think I can really write poetry purposeful enough to be a gift. The whole idea bothers me on some level; so utilitarian. -.-;

Oh, and-- to uh, merge things-- memory -has- tainted love before, but at the same time I'm attached to it. Almost like I value the memory of my own pain as much as the love. I'm rather perverse in some ways, probably. Okay, I know I am. :>