~~ wheeee!
Mar. 20th, 2004 07:37 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
reenkaDudes! Dudettes! Various interested parties (or not)!
There's going to be a movie this year! More specifically, a Neil Gaiman and Dave McKean movie(!!) called MirrorMask(!!)
Halfway digitally animated, halfway live action, about this girl, who wants to run away from the circus, to join the real world. Eeek. I'm trying not to be too excited, but that seriously sounds like the best tagline ever :D
Most of the world probably knows about this already, but I'm all... amazed. And also wary, because... theoretically, it could be a disappointment just like all the other highly awaited *cough*Star Wars*cough* things lately. But it's better, 'cause it's not a book or comic adaptation, right? It's not a sequel. It's not something one has expectations for, except it's -Neil- and Neil is -god-, so.
Also, I hear this McKean fellow knows his stuff ;)
~~
Sometimes I feel like they're only -mine- and no one else's. And it's true-- my Harry & Draco -are- mine. Like no one else could possibly understand how I feel, how much I love them, what it all means to me, how perfect it is in my head. Or maybe not even perfect; just intense. It's like I really love -through- them, and I know their love is real because -my- love is real. They really are my own characters by now, in a way. They're inspired elsewhere and have elements of this-and-that and lives that are nearly completely borrowed, but their hearts-- their hearts are mine, quite literally. Which is probably just a product of having written them for so long, so much longer than I've written anything or anyone else. Than I -could- write anything else, at least so far.
I don't know if I'm alone in this or not. I don't know if people who concentrate on two characters like this in fanfiction have this happen to them, where the characters sort of worm their way inside their heart and take residence. I know them better, sometimes, than I know my friends. I know them inside out, and yet still they are a mystery to me, largerly. Their hearts aren't completely open to me any more than they are to themselves.
This isn't about shipping them together, or being a "shippy writer" who writes romance because that's the be-all-and-end-all of fic for them. I still haven't written a fic I'd consider a true H/D romance. It's so difficult for me, to really -do- it. Like touching the sky. Like attaining perfection. It's just that they live in my head, and they won't leave no matter what I do. They don't have labels. They're not enemies. They're not soulmates. They don't really just hate each other or just love each other. If I summed their relationship up in one word, it would be "need".
It's almost like no one else can really write them right (including me) because they're too real for that. I mean, JKR's own Harry -is- "right" (especially in the last book), but even that isn't everything, mostly because of the limited pov. In my head, Harry isn't complete without that vision from the outside, that distance and contrast.
It's funny, because this isn't about fandom. I'm not a "fan", because that implies an outsider's view, someone who -looks upon- and -admires-. I don't... I don't admire them, or their world, exactly. Maybe that's why I don't have much attraction to pretty-ice-boy Draco-- because I don't feel the need to admire Draco, or Harry, or any character I love. I don't admire people easily, and when I do, it's very much separate from love. Love is about need, devotion, protectiveness, vulnerability, pain, joy. Love isn't really about standing back and admiring except in the most initial stages, it seems to me. That's more about crushes, infatuation-- still pretty painful, but the pretty is very much in evidence along with the pain. Love can be ugly-- it can be about drowning in ugliness while creating the most exquisite beauty.
To me, love isn't self-conscious, possibly not conscious at all. They can't tell each other they love each other in my head, partly because their love is so a part of them, they probably wouldn't know what to call it. It's everything. And no, I don't know why I'm saying this. I think I was feeling a bit possessive, there. And now I realize that it's only because I'm possessed :>
There's going to be a movie this year! More specifically, a Neil Gaiman and Dave McKean movie(!!) called MirrorMask(!!)
Halfway digitally animated, halfway live action, about this girl, who wants to run away from the circus, to join the real world. Eeek. I'm trying not to be too excited, but that seriously sounds like the best tagline ever :D
Most of the world probably knows about this already, but I'm all... amazed. And also wary, because... theoretically, it could be a disappointment just like all the other highly awaited *cough*Star Wars*cough* things lately. But it's better, 'cause it's not a book or comic adaptation, right? It's not a sequel. It's not something one has expectations for, except it's -Neil- and Neil is -god-, so.
Also, I hear this McKean fellow knows his stuff ;)
~~
Sometimes I feel like they're only -mine- and no one else's. And it's true-- my Harry & Draco -are- mine. Like no one else could possibly understand how I feel, how much I love them, what it all means to me, how perfect it is in my head. Or maybe not even perfect; just intense. It's like I really love -through- them, and I know their love is real because -my- love is real. They really are my own characters by now, in a way. They're inspired elsewhere and have elements of this-and-that and lives that are nearly completely borrowed, but their hearts-- their hearts are mine, quite literally. Which is probably just a product of having written them for so long, so much longer than I've written anything or anyone else. Than I -could- write anything else, at least so far.
I don't know if I'm alone in this or not. I don't know if people who concentrate on two characters like this in fanfiction have this happen to them, where the characters sort of worm their way inside their heart and take residence. I know them better, sometimes, than I know my friends. I know them inside out, and yet still they are a mystery to me, largerly. Their hearts aren't completely open to me any more than they are to themselves.
This isn't about shipping them together, or being a "shippy writer" who writes romance because that's the be-all-and-end-all of fic for them. I still haven't written a fic I'd consider a true H/D romance. It's so difficult for me, to really -do- it. Like touching the sky. Like attaining perfection. It's just that they live in my head, and they won't leave no matter what I do. They don't have labels. They're not enemies. They're not soulmates. They don't really just hate each other or just love each other. If I summed their relationship up in one word, it would be "need".
It's almost like no one else can really write them right (including me) because they're too real for that. I mean, JKR's own Harry -is- "right" (especially in the last book), but even that isn't everything, mostly because of the limited pov. In my head, Harry isn't complete without that vision from the outside, that distance and contrast.
It's funny, because this isn't about fandom. I'm not a "fan", because that implies an outsider's view, someone who -looks upon- and -admires-. I don't... I don't admire them, or their world, exactly. Maybe that's why I don't have much attraction to pretty-ice-boy Draco-- because I don't feel the need to admire Draco, or Harry, or any character I love. I don't admire people easily, and when I do, it's very much separate from love. Love is about need, devotion, protectiveness, vulnerability, pain, joy. Love isn't really about standing back and admiring except in the most initial stages, it seems to me. That's more about crushes, infatuation-- still pretty painful, but the pretty is very much in evidence along with the pain. Love can be ugly-- it can be about drowning in ugliness while creating the most exquisite beauty.
To me, love isn't self-conscious, possibly not conscious at all. They can't tell each other they love each other in my head, partly because their love is so a part of them, they probably wouldn't know what to call it. It's everything. And no, I don't know why I'm saying this. I think I was feeling a bit possessive, there. And now I realize that it's only because I'm possessed :>
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
*too lazy to log out*
no subject
Date: 2004-03-20 06:30 pm (UTC)