~~ too bad, so sad...
Feb. 5th, 2004 02:13 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
reenkaThing is...
HP, fandom-wise, is starting to frustrate me more than anything else, especially 'cause I'm the type of person to always go looking outside my little comfort-zone out of some sort of... I dunno... perversity. So I go looking at the lj's of people who ship Sirius/Snape or Lucius/Snape or whatever, and on the one hand, it expands my horizons, and on the other hand it frustrates me. I still get the urge to defend Draco whenever someone seems to not understand him in the slightest, but I'm -tired- of that now, 'cause it won't -matter- to anyone other than the people already receptive to the ideas. The others don't actually -read- mostly H/D-centric journals, I figure. There's only so much time in the day, all that.
It's just... I dunno why I'm so sensitive to people's different little mini-verses within the larger Potterverse fanon, but I am. I don't -care- about the non-B/S shippers. Things that go against my OTP in some other fandom might discomfit me, but they don't actually -bother- me with any serious intensity. Whereas I've gotten -more- rather than less sensitive to things in HP with time, it seems.
I think it's just... not that I really have issues with any pairing-- it's more how there's a -stance- that liking a certain pairing seems to imply. If it's true in other fandoms, I'm not aware of it. I have no clue if Buffy/Spike shippers are different in "type" and overall outlook than say, Spike/Xander shippers. Blissful ignorance, really. They seem to all be friends with each other. I don't get a sense of segregation between factions-- though obviously I'm very -very- outside it all and have barely read any lj's at all, so I'm just going by sites linking to each other.
I feel like it's not just a question of different strokes for different folks in HP, not entirely. It's just hard to find a real point of commonality at -all-, even though supposedly we all like the same thing-- but there are a number of people that are just here for the hotness of Alan Rickman, it seems. What do I have in common with them? And why do I even care if I don't? I don't know. I guess I -don't- care. And well... I like it that way.
It's even more ironic because I don't actually feel a vast similarity of outlook with the great majority of the H/D faction, either, because it tends to be light on analysis and is kind of... one step above Draco/Ginny, as far as general masses. But it -really- frustrates me that the adult-shippers hold themselves -so- far apart, though I'm sure the segregation is mutual. And it also bothers me that liking Sirius and Remus and Snape almost always necessitates having little if any affection for Harry and Ron and Draco-- and vice versa. I mean, it's not like there are people who only like Giles and Wesley and um, I dunno... I guess the vampires are old... but not any of the Scoobies, right? That's just silly, right?
I wrote all this just to stop myself from writing yet another pro-Draco rant. I'm just -tired- of it now. To hell with it, man. No one cares, and I'd just be rehashing things I'd said a million times before and... okay I'm wasting time anyway, but.
It has nothing to do with me, really. Who cares if people are into the adult characters 'cause of some misbegotten idea that they're hot (and "mature")? No skin off my back, right? It's just... I've spent -so- much time with this and am -so- invested, it's like... I really do feel like this is -my- place, my community, and I feel frustrated and alienated by all the factions and segregation. I suppose it bothers me 'cause I feel like I don't belong.
See... the people I have the most in common with, as far as the majority of them, are usually -not- into H/D. I mean, sure, most of the friends I'd made in fandom -were- into it at some point, but as far as current make-up of the fandom, the people I identify with intellectually (though not emotionally) are usually into rare pairings and adult-slash and emphatically -not- H/D. I think this is a phase thing, and also to do with the fact that HP has such a huge diversity of age-groups in terms of its audience. Buffy probably has a much more stable 18-30 age-group, come to think of it, so maybe that accounts for there being more flow.
I guess it also bothers me, feeling so split between my emotions & my intellect. Emotionally, I'm solidly pro-Draco, pro-Harry, pro-H/D and every other character except Ron could just go to hell for all I care (well, not really, but). I'm very focused. Emotionally, I can't stand it seeing any of the three of them mocked or badly used. I'm very protective. Intellectually, I'm interested in the whole HP universe, in the details of characterization for every character, in the non-romantic interactions, in Sirius, Snape, Dumbledore-- you name it. I actually -enjoy- seeing mockery of Harry and Draco, intellectually, 'cause I'm pretty tired of the bland worship of them elsewhere.
It bothers me having this conflict within me generated by fandom politics, I suppose. I'm actually intellectually interested in anti-Draco people's thoughts on Draco-- I find them refreshing and much more lucid sometimes, 'cause the majority of Draco-lovers are just -waaaaay- off base and into fanon happyland. Which just bores me, even if it was fun at first.
I think at heart, the problem is-- even though I'm a lit-geek, I don't have that much in common with a lot of lit-geeks my age, simply 'cause what I look for in stories is so... different. Which depresses me. Most college-age English major types aren't looking for angsty, angry fairy-tales. Most people who -are-, don't actually think about it and go after it as more than a candy rush. It doesn't help that a part of me honestly sees H/D as a canon-viable pairing moreso than any other pairing with either character-- not that it -will- happen, but rather that it's the most interesting thing that -could- happen, even though it won't. That same part of me thinks that H/D is about as natural in the narrative sense as... I dunno... Batman and Catwoman. It just -works-. It's -there-. Why -wouldn't- people see it, even -if- they don't dig it personally?
Anyway, this is all rooted in people having such -wildly-, insanely different views of the Potterverse and its characters. I dunno if every fandom has this wide of a range or what, but the one in HP kind of makes my head hurt. I mean, I guess it still really does confuse me why people insist with such vehemence that canon Draco couldn't and -shouldn't- have depth or a "heart". Why do people insist on bad characterization, even if it's how canon is? Why? How does it make sense that -any- character (person) is that shallow?
HP fandom has always made me want to enact change, be some sort of revolutionary. Write the One True H/D Fic or the One True Draco Fic that will once and for all prove the worthiness of their subject. Heh. In a way, it's almost funny, 'cause hopefully, that's what -canon- should be for, actually. *sigh*
It'd almost be nice to be in a fandom where the character really -is- sexy ('cause it's an actor), rather than one where I cringe every time someone implies they're there for so-and-so (Snape, Draco, Harry's) sex appeal. I've gotten to the point where even the -implication- of someone digging on them that way is starting to make me sick, kind of. Like, even using![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
duckpuppy's cute little eyeliner!Harry in an icon. Dude, I really loved that pic, but I'm actually feeling a little protective of Harry, seeing that icon. This just has to stop. I dunno how. Prolly this break was for the best, even if unintentional.
HP, fandom-wise, is starting to frustrate me more than anything else, especially 'cause I'm the type of person to always go looking outside my little comfort-zone out of some sort of... I dunno... perversity. So I go looking at the lj's of people who ship Sirius/Snape or Lucius/Snape or whatever, and on the one hand, it expands my horizons, and on the other hand it frustrates me. I still get the urge to defend Draco whenever someone seems to not understand him in the slightest, but I'm -tired- of that now, 'cause it won't -matter- to anyone other than the people already receptive to the ideas. The others don't actually -read- mostly H/D-centric journals, I figure. There's only so much time in the day, all that.
It's just... I dunno why I'm so sensitive to people's different little mini-verses within the larger Potterverse fanon, but I am. I don't -care- about the non-B/S shippers. Things that go against my OTP in some other fandom might discomfit me, but they don't actually -bother- me with any serious intensity. Whereas I've gotten -more- rather than less sensitive to things in HP with time, it seems.
I think it's just... not that I really have issues with any pairing-- it's more how there's a -stance- that liking a certain pairing seems to imply. If it's true in other fandoms, I'm not aware of it. I have no clue if Buffy/Spike shippers are different in "type" and overall outlook than say, Spike/Xander shippers. Blissful ignorance, really. They seem to all be friends with each other. I don't get a sense of segregation between factions-- though obviously I'm very -very- outside it all and have barely read any lj's at all, so I'm just going by sites linking to each other.
I feel like it's not just a question of different strokes for different folks in HP, not entirely. It's just hard to find a real point of commonality at -all-, even though supposedly we all like the same thing-- but there are a number of people that are just here for the hotness of Alan Rickman, it seems. What do I have in common with them? And why do I even care if I don't? I don't know. I guess I -don't- care. And well... I like it that way.
It's even more ironic because I don't actually feel a vast similarity of outlook with the great majority of the H/D faction, either, because it tends to be light on analysis and is kind of... one step above Draco/Ginny, as far as general masses. But it -really- frustrates me that the adult-shippers hold themselves -so- far apart, though I'm sure the segregation is mutual. And it also bothers me that liking Sirius and Remus and Snape almost always necessitates having little if any affection for Harry and Ron and Draco-- and vice versa. I mean, it's not like there are people who only like Giles and Wesley and um, I dunno... I guess the vampires are old... but not any of the Scoobies, right? That's just silly, right?
I wrote all this just to stop myself from writing yet another pro-Draco rant. I'm just -tired- of it now. To hell with it, man. No one cares, and I'd just be rehashing things I'd said a million times before and... okay I'm wasting time anyway, but.
It has nothing to do with me, really. Who cares if people are into the adult characters 'cause of some misbegotten idea that they're hot (and "mature")? No skin off my back, right? It's just... I've spent -so- much time with this and am -so- invested, it's like... I really do feel like this is -my- place, my community, and I feel frustrated and alienated by all the factions and segregation. I suppose it bothers me 'cause I feel like I don't belong.
See... the people I have the most in common with, as far as the majority of them, are usually -not- into H/D. I mean, sure, most of the friends I'd made in fandom -were- into it at some point, but as far as current make-up of the fandom, the people I identify with intellectually (though not emotionally) are usually into rare pairings and adult-slash and emphatically -not- H/D. I think this is a phase thing, and also to do with the fact that HP has such a huge diversity of age-groups in terms of its audience. Buffy probably has a much more stable 18-30 age-group, come to think of it, so maybe that accounts for there being more flow.
I guess it also bothers me, feeling so split between my emotions & my intellect. Emotionally, I'm solidly pro-Draco, pro-Harry, pro-H/D and every other character except Ron could just go to hell for all I care (well, not really, but). I'm very focused. Emotionally, I can't stand it seeing any of the three of them mocked or badly used. I'm very protective. Intellectually, I'm interested in the whole HP universe, in the details of characterization for every character, in the non-romantic interactions, in Sirius, Snape, Dumbledore-- you name it. I actually -enjoy- seeing mockery of Harry and Draco, intellectually, 'cause I'm pretty tired of the bland worship of them elsewhere.
It bothers me having this conflict within me generated by fandom politics, I suppose. I'm actually intellectually interested in anti-Draco people's thoughts on Draco-- I find them refreshing and much more lucid sometimes, 'cause the majority of Draco-lovers are just -waaaaay- off base and into fanon happyland. Which just bores me, even if it was fun at first.
I think at heart, the problem is-- even though I'm a lit-geek, I don't have that much in common with a lot of lit-geeks my age, simply 'cause what I look for in stories is so... different. Which depresses me. Most college-age English major types aren't looking for angsty, angry fairy-tales. Most people who -are-, don't actually think about it and go after it as more than a candy rush. It doesn't help that a part of me honestly sees H/D as a canon-viable pairing moreso than any other pairing with either character-- not that it -will- happen, but rather that it's the most interesting thing that -could- happen, even though it won't. That same part of me thinks that H/D is about as natural in the narrative sense as... I dunno... Batman and Catwoman. It just -works-. It's -there-. Why -wouldn't- people see it, even -if- they don't dig it personally?
Anyway, this is all rooted in people having such -wildly-, insanely different views of the Potterverse and its characters. I dunno if every fandom has this wide of a range or what, but the one in HP kind of makes my head hurt. I mean, I guess it still really does confuse me why people insist with such vehemence that canon Draco couldn't and -shouldn't- have depth or a "heart". Why do people insist on bad characterization, even if it's how canon is? Why? How does it make sense that -any- character (person) is that shallow?
HP fandom has always made me want to enact change, be some sort of revolutionary. Write the One True H/D Fic or the One True Draco Fic that will once and for all prove the worthiness of their subject. Heh. In a way, it's almost funny, 'cause hopefully, that's what -canon- should be for, actually. *sigh*
It'd almost be nice to be in a fandom where the character really -is- sexy ('cause it's an actor), rather than one where I cringe every time someone implies they're there for so-and-so (Snape, Draco, Harry's) sex appeal. I've gotten to the point where even the -implication- of someone digging on them that way is starting to make me sick, kind of. Like, even using
duckpuppy's cute little eyeliner!Harry in an icon. Dude, I really loved that pic, but I'm actually feeling a little protective of Harry, seeing that icon. This just has to stop. I dunno how. Prolly this break was for the best, even if unintentional.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
Re: heh
Date: 2004-02-06 03:06 am (UTC)the joys of het, you say?
how 'bout that D/Hr? Eh? Eh?
*proves your point gleefully*
Re: heh
Date: 2004-02-06 03:15 am (UTC)now -that's- out of left field~:)
i'm still squicked by most hp het. i dunno what it is. there is no pairing that really clicks for me except maybe r/hr and even that doesn't inspire me to read smut, which is my basic standby for any pairing. if i like it even a little i'll read smut in it, but with r/hr and every single other het pairing in hp, it squicks the hell out of me. can't help it.
on the other hand, b/s is rather hot. then again, i have visuals :D :D
see, problem is, d/hr isn't really a hot pairing. hermione would prolly be even more prudish and stuck up with draco than with other people. like, ron & harry loosen her up 'cause they're friends, but i'd think that hermione would be rather prim with non-friends, which sort of... is unsexy to me.
also, hot-blooded hermione of any sort kind of disturbs me, y'know :> though i did write it.
i can't imagine d/hr sex. i'm -trying-, i really am. nothing.
seriously. can't. harry & hermione, at least, would have tender love-making (EWWWWW) but... draco & hermione? i'm drawing a blank. all i can say is, draco would so cheat on her, man. if not immediately then after 5 years maximum -.-
Re: heh
Date: 2004-02-06 03:22 am (UTC)Because! Because, *dude.* Okay. Here we go. I mean, *there are sparks there, methinks.* Because Hermione is hot-blooded around Draco. She is! She's all 'SLAP!' and she *misses her classes* because she's so *consumed by fury* at him. Hermione goes sort of Ron!spastic around Draco, and I think that's very interesting because normally she is very controlled.
and Draco is intrigued by her. and has clearly been talking about her to his dad. and is attracted to her at the ball.
and for Hermione! A lot of things are about intellect. And I do think there's a very good case for Draco being academically intelligent (well, he is *driven*, is he not, and then he's all 'REMEDIAL POTIONS?' and '*one* Mudblood beat me, yes...') and so there's a reluctant respect thing possible! and then the huuuge ideological gap!
I love this pairing, I do. I'm going to sort out my thoughts on it and present them properly. Suffice it to say that I love it, for now. Hermione's blood will be hot! You will all see!
(and actually, this furthers my theory of this Malfoy Kid Must Have Something, because, this trio has faced ultimate doom, and been very stoic about it, and then along comes this brat and everyone is all 'must hurt Malfoy... fall to floor twitching and grinding teeth...' I mean, he must be the most annoying person in *all the world*, which is sort of impressive. Or, perhaps. I am crazy.)
Re: heh
Date: 2004-02-06 03:42 am (UTC)I also have a thing against seeing Draco as a creature of intellect even though he's not dumb or anything. I think D/Hr shippers tend to try too hard with that, whereas with R/Hr you don't try to make Ron smarter than he is. I like Draco passionate and petty and vengeful and semi-crazed. And while I can see how Draco's narrow-mindedness and evilry make her crazed, I dunno if it's a -personal- thing necessarily, since it -is- so ideological. I guess....
The thing with ideologies is... I don't think it's a romantic concept for me, even though lots of love stories use societal ideologies as aspects in the romantic relationship between two people.In my experience, people's ideologies are some of the things most resistant to change about them. Ideally, I'd want my couple to accept the other's ideology as-is, and I don't think Hermione would do that for Draco. Whereas I see how Harry & Draco could/would make each other kind of question their ideologies at the same time, and meet somewhere outside the boundaries of both.
Hee. I can see how I could like D/Hr, it's just that I'm so exclusive in the roles I give to things, what they mean to me and so on, and D/Hr kinda infringes on H/D turf in my mind, besides the simple "one of the characters is used" deal. Depends what you want for the character, I guess. I read this essay on Harry/Tonks which would almost have been convincing if I -wanted- Harry to get more independent and confident through the love & encouragement of an older woman, y'know? As is, it's not what I want for Harry, so the whole ideal is moot to me.
In a way, I can see how they could be made like Spencer Tracy and Katherina Hepburn or something-- snarky & professional & verbally cutting & energetic in bed, I guess, too. The problem is, I think of Draco as having too many emotional issues, as being obsessive and needy and messed up and I feel like he could use the violent edge that Harry has in just the right quantity, combined with the neediness and potential loyalty and an understanding of each other as equals. The problem is, D/Hr is a romantic pairing, and I can't do my whole idealistic romantic gig if it conflicts with another pairing I already ship :> Actually, it conflicts with R/Hr too, come to think of it. Was forgetting that :>
There is -something- there, though. The whole Hermione-loses-control thing is a definite plus, but I think it's just more constructive with Ron 'cause they complement each other, they work as a team, too. Hermione would be -useful- for Draco as an experience (and vice versa), but I get this strong feeling that she could -definitely- do better, and anyway, what about Ron and Harry? I love them both too much to ditch them. Also, I think D/Hr would prolly 'cause more problems in the trio than H/D, 'cause you Ron & Harry need Hermione as glue, whereas Ron & Hermione could conceivably just get together and/or hang out.
That said, I kind of like it as a prelude for H/D, which like, -no one- does & it really makes no realistic sense, but~:)