~~ sentimentally yours.
Sep. 10th, 2003 03:52 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
reenkawah. this is a silly, sentimental thing, but.
siiiiiigh. hana-dan (the `hana yori dango' manga) is over.
eep. i'm all "......" and... i dunno. it's weird when stories finally come to an end, after a long, long time following them (more than a year now). i haven't had that happen yet with any fanfic (or any serialized thing that i've read/seen -everything- of, except one comic), and it just feels so... soft and empty, like i'm floating in space and i don't know how to feel except it's -over- and it's not -bad- exactly, just... different. i don't know if it's just that i don't like change-- because i don't feel like i -hate- it, just... usually things end with a bang (in my life) or just totally stretch out to the point of pain. it doesn't tend to just dissipate like mist, soft and warm and then it's gone.
i've been feeling all sentimental ever since yesterday with the meme. hee. that really rocked me (in a good way). i'm really not used to positive (or negative) attention on some sort of noticeable scale. i mean, usually it just freaks me out, but if it's people i -like- and admire, there's just this really warm feeling. wah.
and then i drew large animal bones for art class today, and -that- was relaxing and then hanadan ended. i've had a big investment in tsukushi and tsukasa at one point; probably my favorite anime couple, as big as h/d except i didn't write fanfic for them. i mean, i love shion/mokuren (now -there's- obscure for ya), but i totally mary-sue tsukushi like no tomorrow. that used to hold me back, i think. writing/reading boy/girl or girl/girl (not that i -read-, but i wrote them) romances, it's too easy to just say, "wah, i'm just like that" or "wah, i want that". and i want rui & tsukasa for myself, too, and i want to -be- tsukushi: the weed. i probably wouldn't dig almost -any- of the het ships i've been into if i wasn't like, "oooh, wanna -have- that boy". it's been a relief to ship slash ships since i as of yet haven't -wanted- either of the parties for myself in any of my fandoms, no matter how minor.
siiiiigh. it feels like growing up, a little. not taking things so personally all the time, maybe. this is so weird-- i just meant to say, "uwah, hanadan over!!" and now there's this blather. typical.
anyway. i'll see lasair tomorrow (!!!). so muwahahaha & <333 to you all.
on a last note.
i wish people would tell me goodbye before they unfriended me. but mostly that's just me feeling sentimental, i think. like, "bye, it's been good knowing you". because it's been very very good, knowing all of you.
siiiiiigh. hana-dan (the `hana yori dango' manga) is over.
eep. i'm all "......" and... i dunno. it's weird when stories finally come to an end, after a long, long time following them (more than a year now). i haven't had that happen yet with any fanfic (or any serialized thing that i've read/seen -everything- of, except one comic), and it just feels so... soft and empty, like i'm floating in space and i don't know how to feel except it's -over- and it's not -bad- exactly, just... different. i don't know if it's just that i don't like change-- because i don't feel like i -hate- it, just... usually things end with a bang (in my life) or just totally stretch out to the point of pain. it doesn't tend to just dissipate like mist, soft and warm and then it's gone.
i've been feeling all sentimental ever since yesterday with the meme. hee. that really rocked me (in a good way). i'm really not used to positive (or negative) attention on some sort of noticeable scale. i mean, usually it just freaks me out, but if it's people i -like- and admire, there's just this really warm feeling. wah.
and then i drew large animal bones for art class today, and -that- was relaxing and then hanadan ended. i've had a big investment in tsukushi and tsukasa at one point; probably my favorite anime couple, as big as h/d except i didn't write fanfic for them. i mean, i love shion/mokuren (now -there's- obscure for ya), but i totally mary-sue tsukushi like no tomorrow. that used to hold me back, i think. writing/reading boy/girl or girl/girl (not that i -read-, but i wrote them) romances, it's too easy to just say, "wah, i'm just like that" or "wah, i want that". and i want rui & tsukasa for myself, too, and i want to -be- tsukushi: the weed. i probably wouldn't dig almost -any- of the het ships i've been into if i wasn't like, "oooh, wanna -have- that boy". it's been a relief to ship slash ships since i as of yet haven't -wanted- either of the parties for myself in any of my fandoms, no matter how minor.
siiiiigh. it feels like growing up, a little. not taking things so personally all the time, maybe. this is so weird-- i just meant to say, "uwah, hanadan over!!" and now there's this blather. typical.
anyway. i'll see lasair tomorrow (!!!). so muwahahaha & <333 to you all.
on a last note.
i wish people would tell me goodbye before they unfriended me. but mostly that's just me feeling sentimental, i think. like, "bye, it's been good knowing you". because it's been very very good, knowing all of you.
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no subject
Date: 2003-09-12 12:25 pm (UTC)i totally don't even listen to as much ani as i want to, 'cause it takes me forever to get the actual cds-- i just have a random smattering of songs, and `falling is like this' only in a qaf vid, eheheh -.-
i'm not really a "real fan" of any musician in the sense that i have all their stuff and am an expert. which sucks.
but yeah. i don't think even all ani fans `get' her on a deep level, but i really do-- some songs, anyway. it's like, she says things so simply & powerfully that i can feel it on my -skin-. `untouchable face' is only rivaled by `silent all these years' as far as `the song that makes me relive everything every single time' goes-- not in a happy "awww, luv" sort of way but in a i'm-feeling-all-of-it-at-once-right-now sort of way. she has the powah ^^
no subject
Date: 2003-09-13 12:59 pm (UTC)I am trying to be a fan of Ani... (whiny voice) there are SO MANY CDs! I'm getting there, though... I saw her live, which persuaded me to (try to) become a full-fledged fan. She's really cool live.
Probably the only person I could claim knowing a lot about is Jewel, and I'm so angry with the direction she's gone nowadays, I find it hard to talk about her. Mumph.