~~ just a blip on the blue-screen of lj.

[reenka]

alright, so like no one (except like, two of you) will care about this, but hell, it's all i can think about the past week, so if i didn't talk about -it-, i wouldn't talk about -anything-, for probably like another week or two. (and there isn't -much- to say, anyway, so um. i'm sort of on hiatus-- things to do, gay men to watch bonk, you know how it is).
    plan right now is-- finish my reading list, fanfic & other (this includes textbooks), give you lovelies my feedback, do my beta, finish incompletes, watch moremoremore qaf, finish fic, remember to breathe. order unknown.
    er. anyway.


the main consensus is that brian is an asshole. hot, but an asshole-- someone no one would really want for a friend, someone who'd drive most people insane. he's not "nice". he's not pleasant, most times. he's often saying things that rub others the wrong way, and doing things without considering what others would want him to do.

i don't see why this makes him an asshole. what has he done, anyway? he doesn't play by the social rules of "let's pretend i really want what i couldn't care less about", but why is that a bad thing? honesty doesn't go a long way with most people, i guess. and the truth is? if most people were as WYSIWYG as brian kinney, they'd be seen as assholes too. it's all a matter of playing the game-- other people's game. so brian kinney plays his own game, but the rules are clear-cut, and he doesn't really cheat. everyone else is playing a -different- game, and somehow that makes them better and nicer people?

i'm not a naturally `in your face' sort of person, usually. i don't say things people don't want to hear, although i don't lie to tell them the things they -do-. i just filter a little-- we all do. but my greatest admiration and tolerance is for honesty. there's really no limit to how cutting i'd tolerate people being, if they're just expressing themselves. isn't that what we admire about stand-up comedians? isn't that what's so great about revolutionaries? does it really -matter- if the truth they're speaking isn't kind?

but oh, in my experience, brutally honest people (and brian kinney) -are- kind. he's really a rather intensely caring, kind person, the sort who would do things for other people without wanting acknowledgement or compensation. he does these things like he does everything else-- because that's just what he wanted. if he's caring for his friends, it's not because he's manipulating them or trying to get something for himself. he may almost never be selfless, but when he is, it's real. and he -has- been, more than once.

it's just. true kindness isn't the sort of thing you show by pandering to people's delicate sensibilities. it isn't the sort of thing that necessarily has to make people feel better. true kindness is giving others what they -need-, not necessarily what they want. being willing to forgo the natural instinct to please yourself -and- to please others, and see the truth of what's important in a given situation.
    a truly kind person can be a total bastard in their day-to-day interactions, and it would be completely compatible. life isn't pretty most times, is it. speaking the truth and doing what you want and not compromising-- it's not going to make you everyone's best friend by a long shot. it may make you infamous, but it's not going to make you -liked-.

a lot of my friends-- people i consider beautiful & kind-hearted-- consider themselves mean bitches. one hears a lot of `i would be in slytherin'. and often, it's from the people who don't censor themselves or are... well... strongly moral, even, i'd say. (and often, it's just from wannabes who think draco or snape are hot and dark and angsty, but we'll just ignore them for now.) i wouldn't say it's necessarily convential midwestern american morality or anything, but this sense of right and wrong-- usually that's strongly present.
    they wouldn't believe me-- you know who you are-- you wouldn't believe me if i told you you're not really mean just because you don't cover up the things that are unpretty in you, just because you uncover the unpretty things in others. that's something to be admired.

there's petty cruelty, the refuge of frightened, narrow-minded fools-- i suppose that's draco, and that boy who beat up justin. and then there's lex, and there's brian kinney-- and neither of them are anywhere -near- that. they don't lash out at the world out of fear. they don't bring down other people to make themselves look bigger. they are confident and aware of their power. they don't need to be pointlessly cruel for no reason other than it feels good. that's what makes an asshole, in my book. draco is an asshole, petty and jealous and insecure. i love him, and i don't think you can really -judge- him on adult terms, but i wouldn't really -defend- him. he may be rather harmless, but the intent to wound is there.

anyway.
brian isn't like that. justin knows that, too. justin has a sense for people, and he wouldn't really care as much as he does if he felt that brian was a bad person, a person unworthy of anyone's love. because he -is-. of course, everyone is worthy of love, but -i- think that brian and people like him are worthy of admiration, as well as trust. i would trust brian with my -life-, and i would never say that (as easily) about mike, the supposed "nice guy". and that's all i can say, i guess (finally, eh).
~~

EDIT - all i can remember anymore about that lj-friends compatibility quiz going around is that i'm 106% compatible with ztrin (which made me bounce like you wouldn't believe), and whose latest fic i -will- read as soon as i stop seeing brian&justin dancing naked behind my eyelids everytime i close them. gimme a few days >:D< (everyone else-- well, hautemonde & kitsune13-- starts with 87%, heh.)

Comments

[kearie.livejournal.com]

While I can't really think of anything to add to that, I just want to tell you how great this post was. There was a redeemed!Draco debate a few days ago on someone's LJ and I think this point is somewhat relevant to that. You say that Draco falls into the realm of petty cruelty. Still, when we redeem Draco we do tend to keep him somewhat mean so that he doesn't become OOC. In fact, what people seem to make Draco into is a sort of Brian Kinney. Brutally honest (usually manifested as a cutting wit) yet deeply loyal (usually to Harry or Hermione or Ginny or whoever he's paired with at the moment).

Love your meta :)

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

hee. i hadn't considered that, but yes. i've snarked before that people want to make semi-redeemed!draco into what is actually snape, but yah, it's closer to brian kinney. which is pretty much, equally ridiculous, though i can see the attraction. i don't think draco is particularly given to having independent opinions or seems to possess the good qualities that would explain the bad ones. i mean, i'm sure he has good qualities, but. actually, i'm not sure who draco would be if he grew up a little (not that brian is all that grown up-- see, they're just different).

i suppose this makes him of an ilk with say, eminem, too. the angry young man with the semi-secret heart of gold, blah blah.

see the thing is, i don't think brian has anything to apologize for, which is draco's -attitude-, but not really the -truth-. not so much because draco's the Big Bad or anything, but more because the things he stands behind are flimsy fictions fed to him by his father, one assumes. there's nothing at all admirable about them, nothing to do with individuality.

i dunno. in my mind, draco would possibly have to be more complex than brian if you were going to make him a likeable character.
first of all, all his snark is juvenile and stupid, not quite the product of a sharp mind or anything. so if he realized how stupid it was to think what he does, what would replace it? i'm not sure.
i think draco is a sad character, in terms of his future. more pathetic than admirable, more lost than self-determined. even to put a positive spin on it, i think he'd retain a sort of veneer of artifice-- melodrama. he's not so much honest as a huge liar, who'd get off on creating ways for himself to be cool and hot even when he had nothing else (not the malfoy name, not his being slytherin, not even meriting harry potter's hatred).

you know what? i think he's more like emmett than he is like brian. ahahahaha >:D
oh god. i think i just squicked myself ><;;
well, if emmett was bitter, disenfranchised and horribly, horribly spoiled. or something. okay, i'm -so- not thinking more on this. *runs away from self's own brain*

[kearie.livejournal.com]

he's not so much honest as a huge liar

I would love to write Draco as a chronic liar (what's the technical term for it? I can't think today...) but feel like writing anything now is stupid with OotP coming out so soon...

Haha, are you implying Draco is an utterly flamboyant drama queen? Because, you know, I think I could live with that implication ;D

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

heheehee, oh no, i'm not -implying-, i'm straight-out -saying-, hee.
when i did my draco meme, i pretty much said it. at least, -my- draco is a compulsive, obsessive, chronically lying little boy... who manages to remain charming and fascinating. somehow. hee >:D

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

oh, and while writing a long plot-based fanfic may not be the best idea, not writing character-driven fics that explore interpersonal relationships and are under 15 pages seems like just a way to deprive yourself of some fun, y'know?~:)