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this seems obvious. so hit me.
reading this post in
nothingbutfic, it suddenly hit me. yes, he's right. whoah. there's no such thing as "shipping h/d"-- no one definition. every fic's harry/draco is going to be different-- it'll have similarities, sure, but it'll also have similarities with other pairings, just because you can characterize a lot of people similarly. it may not fit -as well-, but yes, there are a lot of different harry/draco's and it's a bit hypocritical to include them all when i say "that's my favorite romantic couple to read about." because with every fic, it's a slightly (or often, very) different couple.
and yes, when i say i `ship them, i mean i `ship my own idea, my own amalgam of these characters, fitted together in my mind in their own unique way. sometimes i read a fic and i see a pretty clear reflection of how it is in my mind, and i squee and i'm happy. sometimes the fic is just, well written so i don't care, even though i'd rebel if it was labeled as being about someone else, and all the pairing is doing is allowing me to let down my defenses.
mind you, i'm a very one-true-pairing-oriented person (OTP for me, me, me, me, and also me, me alone). i'm a hopeless romantic, blah blah, so this is troubling to me-- except it isn't, as i'm perfectly happy being in love with my own little world and characters inside my head. i'm also perfectly happy using fics to feed that world, chewing particularly heartily on especially well-fitting bits, enjoying yummy prose, and laughing at good jokes. i do, in truth, see similarities between my favorite characterizations that wouldn't occur as believably between other characters. this happens with a select number of authors and a select number of fics, i admit. some fics, like `irresistible poison' or
ivyblossom's stuff or even `love under will', i enjoy probably wholly outside my need for pure harry/draco goodness. i get off on the details that are inescapably theirs in every even vaguely good in-character fic-- the hair-colors & other physical identifiers, the snark (hopefully), the physical scuffling (ain't gonna get it with draco/hermione-- ain't that hot with ron/draco because it's not as amusing imagining ron fighting, since he seems much more likely to lose control than harry). i like it that every harry has to be The One Fighting Voldemort. you can't escape it.
i like it that every harry has to be The Ultimate Savior yet Troubled By His Inability To Really Save Anyone. i like it that every harry has to (to remain remotely in-character) retain a skeleton of traits. it's that skeleton i want. i'm not that picky. whether draco or harry is misunderstood or angsting or fluffy and lightly snarky doesn't matter, not really. what matters isn't the emotional atmosphere-- though that's a lot of the effect a fic has. you can't sum up harry & draco so easily as ``sexy", ``a meeting of two rivals who have to consider who they are and where they want to be", or ``it's a journey of self-discovery", or ``it encompasses all of the hp world".
i wouldn't say i `ship h/d because they're "like" anything or "stand" for anything. hopefully, what i get is harry & draco, and as long as you give me those two-- and you make them unmistakeably them, plus or minus angst and humor and the end of the world-- how they come together and what their interaction's like isn't as important, because inevitably you are going to have some angst and some ridiculousness and some sexual tension and some screaming and some punching and some self-discovery, because that's what every love affair is like. love between any two characters (or people) is a multi-layered, extremely complex thing, and it has a lot of repeating themes that can be seen across centuries and nations and genders and what have you.
you can tell the same story using any character you want, really. all stories are really the same story, the story of us, growing up, loving, living, fearing, hating, dying. it's all our story.
so why am i still a rabid `shipper?
well.
it's not about the pure story. it's not about the ending or the beginning or the middle, even. it's not about the angst or the fluff or the sex or the fighting or the snark. it's about my own vision, really, that much is obvious-- it's about what they mean to me. and since -i'm- the one reading, it's having its own peculiar influence on me, it's got the key to my lock, baby. it's not about any of the separate motions, or emotions, or plot-devices. in my head, there is The Perfect H/D Story.
i am building it, fic by fic. maybe someday i'll write it.
it won't be angsty or fluffy. it'll say everything i can possibly say about love, and destiny, and free will, and hate, and numbness, and believing in yourself, and trusting your instincts, and trying to be your best self, and war, and desire, and memory, and insanity, and home, and the comfort of knowing you're wanted. and i guess you can write that story about anyone, any two people, any number of people. but i want to write it/read it about harry and draco.
they're real to me. they got here first. they mean what they mean and i just can't take that away from them even if i wanted to. do i mean that this implies h/d are better than any other ship? of course not. i just don't want to -read- any other ship, but i wouldn't even -imagine- saying that, because it's so patently ridiculous making statements about the feelings (and shippiness is all about feelings) of anyone but yourself. i can be a rabid shipper and worship h/d and the ground they fuck on and never say/mean/think anything about what other people `ship because frankly, who the hell cares?
i get upset/angry with reading or thinking about harry or draco with anyone else. not that anyone else ships them with someone else, but just personally being confronted with it, and that's not because i look down on those people, but because it hurts me, that harry and/or draco are cheating, and i wish i hadn't seen that fic because then i'll go around all mopey. yes i take fics way too seriously, why do you ask? like i said, real inside my head.
*sigh* i wish people didn't keep acting like `shipping something means you care aught about other `ships, because i sure don't. i can even read some non-h/d easily enough now, though most easily if it doesn't involve either harry or draco. (oo, tom/hagrid *laughs*). yes, hermione/draco annoys me-- as a concept. the `shippers are fine, i'm all a-okay with the `shippers. it's all about what i think about having an effect on what i imagine, and what i imagine changing my mood, and me being moody ^^;
so, that's why i prefer avoiding hermione/draco fics, for example. fics and `shippers/`shipping are different things, i think.
i'm all for the theory that crushes are weird, cruel, unusual punishments. the more perverse and unlikely the more you see it happen. er. to some people. heh. i agree with whoever said that like, no one has any chemistry in canon. i don't think there's any reasonable, rational, writerly reason to `ship. you `ship because you're full of squeeing, overwhelmed joy and tingliness at the thought of these two snogging and ``getting to know each other better" (ahem), not because you've decided they're the most likely thing since superman first sighted lois lane (oh wait, that was unlikely too, wasn't it... hmm).
you can't be a serious writer and `ship anything unless you're -really- into your characters to an unhealthy degree, probably. i `ship as a reader, not a writer. i also `ship as a disappointed romantic who isn't exactly drawn to the healthiest of situations ^^;
when i -write- harry/draco, i'm all ruthless and i make things difficult for them, and i bring up (in my head, even if not in the fic) all their Issues, and all the Doom and all the Woe and all the Silliness, etc. but really, the pure joy of `shipping is simply believing, against all odds, against all reason. sort of the way it happens in real life. one falls for the most ridiculous, wrong people.
that was my silly `shipper's manifesto. um. which is now over.
reading this post in
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and yes, when i say i `ship them, i mean i `ship my own idea, my own amalgam of these characters, fitted together in my mind in their own unique way. sometimes i read a fic and i see a pretty clear reflection of how it is in my mind, and i squee and i'm happy. sometimes the fic is just, well written so i don't care, even though i'd rebel if it was labeled as being about someone else, and all the pairing is doing is allowing me to let down my defenses.
mind you, i'm a very one-true-pairing-oriented person (OTP for me, me, me, me, and also me, me alone). i'm a hopeless romantic, blah blah, so this is troubling to me-- except it isn't, as i'm perfectly happy being in love with my own little world and characters inside my head. i'm also perfectly happy using fics to feed that world, chewing particularly heartily on especially well-fitting bits, enjoying yummy prose, and laughing at good jokes. i do, in truth, see similarities between my favorite characterizations that wouldn't occur as believably between other characters. this happens with a select number of authors and a select number of fics, i admit. some fics, like `irresistible poison' or
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i like it that every harry has to be The Ultimate Savior yet Troubled By His Inability To Really Save Anyone. i like it that every harry has to (to remain remotely in-character) retain a skeleton of traits. it's that skeleton i want. i'm not that picky. whether draco or harry is misunderstood or angsting or fluffy and lightly snarky doesn't matter, not really. what matters isn't the emotional atmosphere-- though that's a lot of the effect a fic has. you can't sum up harry & draco so easily as ``sexy", ``a meeting of two rivals who have to consider who they are and where they want to be", or ``it's a journey of self-discovery", or ``it encompasses all of the hp world".
i wouldn't say i `ship h/d because they're "like" anything or "stand" for anything. hopefully, what i get is harry & draco, and as long as you give me those two-- and you make them unmistakeably them, plus or minus angst and humor and the end of the world-- how they come together and what their interaction's like isn't as important, because inevitably you are going to have some angst and some ridiculousness and some sexual tension and some screaming and some punching and some self-discovery, because that's what every love affair is like. love between any two characters (or people) is a multi-layered, extremely complex thing, and it has a lot of repeating themes that can be seen across centuries and nations and genders and what have you.
you can tell the same story using any character you want, really. all stories are really the same story, the story of us, growing up, loving, living, fearing, hating, dying. it's all our story.
so why am i still a rabid `shipper?
well.
it's not about the pure story. it's not about the ending or the beginning or the middle, even. it's not about the angst or the fluff or the sex or the fighting or the snark. it's about my own vision, really, that much is obvious-- it's about what they mean to me. and since -i'm- the one reading, it's having its own peculiar influence on me, it's got the key to my lock, baby. it's not about any of the separate motions, or emotions, or plot-devices. in my head, there is The Perfect H/D Story.
i am building it, fic by fic. maybe someday i'll write it.
it won't be angsty or fluffy. it'll say everything i can possibly say about love, and destiny, and free will, and hate, and numbness, and believing in yourself, and trusting your instincts, and trying to be your best self, and war, and desire, and memory, and insanity, and home, and the comfort of knowing you're wanted. and i guess you can write that story about anyone, any two people, any number of people. but i want to write it/read it about harry and draco.
they're real to me. they got here first. they mean what they mean and i just can't take that away from them even if i wanted to. do i mean that this implies h/d are better than any other ship? of course not. i just don't want to -read- any other ship, but i wouldn't even -imagine- saying that, because it's so patently ridiculous making statements about the feelings (and shippiness is all about feelings) of anyone but yourself. i can be a rabid shipper and worship h/d and the ground they fuck on and never say/mean/think anything about what other people `ship because frankly, who the hell cares?
i get upset/angry with reading or thinking about harry or draco with anyone else. not that anyone else ships them with someone else, but just personally being confronted with it, and that's not because i look down on those people, but because it hurts me, that harry and/or draco are cheating, and i wish i hadn't seen that fic because then i'll go around all mopey. yes i take fics way too seriously, why do you ask? like i said, real inside my head.
*sigh* i wish people didn't keep acting like `shipping something means you care aught about other `ships, because i sure don't. i can even read some non-h/d easily enough now, though most easily if it doesn't involve either harry or draco. (oo, tom/hagrid *laughs*). yes, hermione/draco annoys me-- as a concept. the `shippers are fine, i'm all a-okay with the `shippers. it's all about what i think about having an effect on what i imagine, and what i imagine changing my mood, and me being moody ^^;
so, that's why i prefer avoiding hermione/draco fics, for example. fics and `shippers/`shipping are different things, i think.
i'm all for the theory that crushes are weird, cruel, unusual punishments. the more perverse and unlikely the more you see it happen. er. to some people. heh. i agree with whoever said that like, no one has any chemistry in canon. i don't think there's any reasonable, rational, writerly reason to `ship. you `ship because you're full of squeeing, overwhelmed joy and tingliness at the thought of these two snogging and ``getting to know each other better" (ahem), not because you've decided they're the most likely thing since superman first sighted lois lane (oh wait, that was unlikely too, wasn't it... hmm).
you can't be a serious writer and `ship anything unless you're -really- into your characters to an unhealthy degree, probably. i `ship as a reader, not a writer. i also `ship as a disappointed romantic who isn't exactly drawn to the healthiest of situations ^^;
when i -write- harry/draco, i'm all ruthless and i make things difficult for them, and i bring up (in my head, even if not in the fic) all their Issues, and all the Doom and all the Woe and all the Silliness, etc. but really, the pure joy of `shipping is simply believing, against all odds, against all reason. sort of the way it happens in real life. one falls for the most ridiculous, wrong people.
that was my silly `shipper's manifesto. um. which is now over.
no subject
Date: 2002-10-14 11:52 pm (UTC)--;; I'm like that too. I have problems reading fic where Draco's with anyone besides Harry. It's the reason that I can't read the Draco Trilogy all the way through. The Draco/Hermione and Draco/other people stuff bothers me. It's not that I'm against het. I'm just bothered by anything that's not Harry/Draco. Not that I'd ever condemn anyone who reads or writes not H/D fics. I'm one of those OTP people too. I feel a little bad about my narrow-mindedness, though.
I'm glad I'm not the only person who takes fanfiction too seriously.