~~on reading and stories and being old-fashioned.

[reenka]

i'm a stylist. a style slut, you might say. i admit it. lilting sentences & perfect metaphors & allegoric interludes & words playing off each other, emotions running like eyeliner mixed with tears down the page. the perfect word, the ideal phrase-- that is what poetry is made of. it's not enough. if that's all there is-- emotion and poetry-- i perceive it entirely differently from a story. a story which you want to leave you on the edge of your seat, needing more, being lost in it, an experience as deeply emotional & spiritual and yet as grounded in the physical as star-gazing.
    language can do many things, and i appreciate every single one of them. that's not to say i want only the most beautiful of them, to keep. in fact, i'd say i would keep the most ephemeral, the most superficial, a lot of the time. characters are what stay with me. plot-lines, ideas, personalities, worlds. i live in them, i become part of them. words have always been a part of me, and strangely, the pleasure of a perfect set of words is a more momentary pleasure, less bound to memory. while i'm reading, i need it to be beautiful, and in my memory the scent of rapture will always remain around that story, when i think of it. it's as if you see a beautiful coastline, and you never forget it. the beauty, the majesty. it is more than you can take in-- and yet you make it a part of you. beauty sinks into you and enriches you and gives you inspiration for years to come. but that's not necessarily why i'm a compulsive reader.

can you blame me if i want it all? plot is what grounds you and gives you a seat in reality. characterization and dialogue make your story move, give it life. a story that's purely atmospheric and emotional is like a drug-- very effective, extremely perception-altering, but because of that very change in perception, you can't remember what you saw there as clearly, when you come out of it, when you hit the other side, when you're sober again. you remember a hint, a taste, but you can't necessarily bring it all back.

with stories that are meant to merely affect you-- plot or no plot-- stories that basically have a point, they mean to make you feel something, see something that the author intends-- i get a certain amount of blockage. if i feel the author is trying to impart something to me, i tend to resist. if it's too obviously depressing, i distance myself. if it's obviously fluff, i jump right in, anyone's always free to make me feel good. in the end, i censor what i keep with me. i keep most things in subconscious memory, i'm glad i read it but feel no need to dwell on the places it conjured within my imagination.

and that's really what i'm looking for. roomy stories-- stories you can live in, characters you can get to know. that's why, as stupid as jkr is, stylistically, she's so popular-- because in the end, you can do without style, really, as far as reaching people. she has roomy stories-- she could fill them out (and it would be nice if she did, certainly would make her a better writer), but she doesn't need to. she draws just enough to draw us in and put us there. there are enough characters, enough pieces of the world, that you can draw them around you and live there, identify with the people, breathe the air, believe in the things they believe if you wanted. you can go to hogwarts.

mind you, i'm using her as an example but in truth, reading her doesn't really grab -me-. i get second-hand exposure and i'm quite happy with it. i like more depth-- i like more emotion, more complexity-- and still, still would like that roominess, that expansiveness of vision, retained. but even second-hand-- and i have read some-- you get this sense of Storytelling. of here someone is, telling you a Story, in the grand tradition. and that's what grabs people, still-- and has since the days when we whispered ghost stories by the fire.

i like to laugh at the stupidest, most unlikely jokes imaginable. and i like to breathe deeper and calmer and be bathed in beauty. and i like to be so overwhelmed with breathless perfection and the vividness of emotion that i cry. those are indispensable things, the stuff of poetry. but if i had to choose-- i just want stories. worlds to explore. people to be part of for a while. lives to live. there's nothing lesser about that, nothing that makes it less of an artform, less worthy of serious pursuit.

so no, short stories aren't really my preferred form. i like novels, great big meaty things, with yummy shimmering poetic centers. i like things that have -span- and -scope- and -breadth- as well as depth. that are both condensed and easy to swallow. easy to slip into and easy to get lost in. i read because i like to dream, and to forget about stuff, and to remember the important stuff. poetry is different-- poetry is more like nature, and sunsets, and dancing in the rain-- except it also tears you open much more viscerally, it also hits you like a hammer on the head, it also moves you and grounds you within yourself. a good novel is like that too, except even more subtle, subversive about it. a good novel grabs you and never lets go, and you feel like it's taking you further and further away, and you want it to, and you have to forcibly stop to admire the scenery (the language). it works on many levels. it has no agenda except to show you what things could be like, to show you a facet of reality and to make you believe fantasy is reality, while you're caught within it, and often, even while you remember it later.

i don't know if any of this had a point, really. i wanted to pimp good ole fashioned stories. with plot. and characters we fall in love with. and a whole large range of emotions. and no set "moral". and no obvious "theme". yes. stories that make you think and make you forget who you are and what you were thinking about before you started reading, at the same time. that's why i read in general, and why i read fanfic, and in fact what i'd like to do writing my own stuff. why do you read?
~~

am pissy. death-fics can be so, so stupid. what the hell?? "i feel angst and then i die". *smites*
that was a waste of time. ha. i wish i could just post that as a reply to the list. *laughs* "this story is pointless unless you're a masochist, but i'll just be a sadist right now and say i wish it died instead of draco, thank you and good night"
    EDIT: um. i did send an email to the list. was that a flame? that was a flame, wasn't it *facepalms* well, not really-- i said virtually -nothing- about the fic. i just said i hated this harry, this draco, and winter. i hated death-fics. i do. i do. why am i supposed to be ripped apart by these stupid scenarios where people die for no reason? no. fucking. reason. that's just-- there's enough of that in real life. if i wanted senseless death i'd turn on the news, thankyouverymuch. well, i'd be nice if the writing was awesome. but it wasn't. so all i'm left with is a "angst. angst. numbness. fatalism. angst. kissing. snow. death." o_0

yo, that's just not cool, man..

Comments

[andi-sunrider.livejournal.com]

Have you ever read "Fugitive Pieces'? I think it's by Anne Michaels, or something like that. I think that you'd enjoy it. It's her first novel, but she was a poet beforehand, and so it's just amazingly written.... The imagery that she invokes is superb. It's been nominated for soem pretty big awards, too, although I don't remember which ones... Just go read it! Supoprt Canadian writers!!

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

okie, i'll keep that in mind.
though, my point was i want -plot- rather than -style-, though i luurve style i'll pick plot over style if i had to ^^;;

i pretty much want fantasy world-building & stuff, for entertainment value. am shallow and unrepentant.
as well as picky ^^;
pretty much mostly read fantasy/magic realist stuff. and romance. some historical fics, if it's celtic/medieval britain. moonlight reading stuff to do with japan or japanese/asian (female-centric) experience in america. wow i guess that sounds narrow in scope, but that's a lot of fic, lemme tell you~:)

well, just so you know ^^

~reena

Re:

[andi-sunrider.livejournal.com]

Well, okay,I'm stupid. Really. I thought my prof wasjust being mean to me when he said that I don't see the bigger picture, but I guess that he's right. This one is the basic buldingsroman as far as plot is concerned, but it's amazing; there's enough plot to ground it. It's about this guy who escaped the Nazis by hiding in mud, and this Greek guy takes him in, and then they live out the war and move to Canada. It was the "characters are what stay with me" line of your post, and the same paragraph, and the "yummy shimmering poetic centers" that made me think of this book. The characters are amazing(I really need a thesaurus); they're so intense and deep. It's partially historical, I suppose, although it's not really celtic/medeival britain. However that's the type of historical books that I usually like, too, and I still loved this one. It's one of the few puvlished books that has made me cry. I suggest it if you ever feel like something different, non-ficish. Maybe fore when you're old and stuck in bed all day;) like we all will be....

[penelope-z.livejournal.com]

get your ass on AIM and let's talk fics.

Thanks for the TUW support btw

[bookshop.livejournal.com]

0_0 I'm with Ria, I thought your message was oddly harsh when I read it, but I thought it was more an emotional outburst rather than a flame.

okay if i reply to this on armchair?

oh, and "as stupid as jkr is, stylistically"??? could you be more specific?

[unstasis.livejournal.com]

Umm. you don't actually look like that old guy in your icon, do you? That's kinda freaky if you do, or somehting. I thought most of the people in this fandom were 16-25 year old slightly hyper girls, not whimsical old men by the riverside.

She's so perverse sometimes that reenka.. It really ruffles her feather's when you randomly accuse her about nothing like I am..

Back to the catacombs with me! hahahahahahaaaaaaa!!!!!

[bookshop.livejournal.com]

I look about as much like God, er, I mean Stephen Sondheim, as you do the young guy in your avatar. *squints* I think that's a guy. Yeah. :D

[unstasis.livejournal.com]

But I am that guy, at least I was...

Don't get as many picture took anymore because...

Well If I knew that I'd most like not be here...

But here (http://hopeisus.fateback.com/pics/meandidance.jpg), I once more do appear...

---

The one here is about a year ago at my sister's weding (have one more picture of then too but this one's more.. snazzy? or not.. The other one was about 4 years ago. Umm so you are sorta or were recently a little old man by the river I mean God I mean Sondheim:)

[unstasis.livejournal.com]

Umm redownloaded it so it should work now (if it matters).. I look liek a boy right? {questions masculinity}
Yes of course!

right?

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

oh, and "as stupid as jkr is, stylistically"??? could you be more specific?

the way she uses words leaves much to be desired. she often uses the same old blunt, non-descriptive, elementary-school words (yes, yes, children's book, yes). they get very annoying. shel silverstein she isn't.

you never get a -sense- for anything, as in, atmosphere, description, emotional resonance. you have to completely create that yourself. she always "just states" things. "this is how it is". clomp. clomp. clomp.

her dialogue is good. her transmission of actual -people- through dialogue leaves some to be desired. but her -characterization- of people/places is awful. two-dimensional. i consider two-dimensionality a style problem.

if it's cold, she'll say "it's cold." if it's freezing she'll say, "it's freezing". if someone's bad she'll say, "they're bad". it's almost genius, if i didn't dislike it so. she manages to distill everything to its most common denominator. every word is the simplest word-- not the simplest, and most beautiful. just simplest. if someone's upset, they're "upset". if someone's afraid (harry, say), she just says, "fear flooded him". i almost like that-- a lot of writers prefer to imply too much, and make their characters too sympathetic in the process. not that jkr has any problem making anyone unsympathetic. again, almost admire that, if it didn't stem from them also being two-dimensional. but still, stylistically, it's not um-- what i'd consider brilliant.

"So Malfoy, jealous and angry, had gone back to taunting Harry about having no proper family."


i -really- hated her description of the dursleys, but it's cute in its way.
er, yeah. so mostly, it's in no way subtle or poetic or lush. that's what i meant.

~irina.