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reenkaEarlier today, I was suddenly hit with the urge to recite the only poem I remember by heart (by Robert Frost) out loud-- just like that guy in 'The Outsiders', who's actually the reason I remember it, 'cause I thought it was so cool when he recited it. Anyway, here's the wav of 'Nature's First Green is Gold' if you're curious :>
You know, I realize I ought to take more care about what I say-- like, having it make sense, proofing it against obvious logic holes & inconsistencies... BUT I CAN'T BE BOTHERED :(( Woe. I'm like '....okay, yes it annoys me when I'm like 'damn, this isn't where I wanted this to go', but ahhhh it's even more bothersome to constantly think of what the reader response would be to any given idea/phrasing'. You may wonder why I bother with -livejournal- if this is just pointless blather, but... well, there's always the off chance someone will know exactly what I mean without me having to actually... explain it -.-;;; SOMETIMES THIS HAPPENS, okay :> Probably too often, or I would've learned more discipline by now -.- ...Yes, I just got in trouble over my casual inaccurate-seeming Sentinel fandom reference... heh Funny 'cause I wasn't really inaccurate [the way I meant what I said], it's just that I didn't bother specifying exactly how I meant what I said, which did sound wrong, but yeah.....
I can only imagine the people who naturally envision readers' responses to anything they write o_0 Ahhhh, godlike powers I shall never [care enough to] possess.... -.-;;;; Ah, it's not that I don't care about accuracy in theory; it's the explaining stuff that's the problem. (...And the other thing is that I -know- being like this makes me seem stupider than [I think] I really am, but even so...... heh I really should learn to communicate more clearly if I wanna get anywhere in life or as a writer, though, I knooooow. Or maybe I should feel special 'cause I've never met anyone consciously lazy about this in this manner; I mean, people either do meta or make some effort to make sense/make a real argument-- at least I feel pretty unique in being unable to either stop thinking Deep Thoughts™ or like... um, be serious/thorough about it.)
ANYWAY, I saw Eragon!! Woo-hoo! :D :D :D And btw, no, I didn't read it. I, uh, don't tend to like most creature features, like dragon!fantasy, specifically. Or vampire!fantasy, werewolf!fantasy, and most people's ideas of unicorns are lame too. Yeah, I know that... uh, doesn't leave a lot of fantasy to go around, and now you know why I was bitter early on in my life as much as now. Anyway, the reason I don't like these is just that everyone else does and therefore they get fucked with the most. Fantasy publishers should really be thankful I like mythic plots, princesses/princes, magicians of all shapes & colors, assassins, gods & priests, warrior mages & supernatural!cops, archetypal arcs & characterizations and of course-- of course!!-- ELVES, ELVES BABY!!1
One thing this movie proved (as I kept writing mini!fanfics for it in my head AS I WATCHED) is that the reason I don't write beyond HP much is that there are simply no other big high fantasy fandoms on lj :)) AHAHAH. *facepalm* Everything is so simple :D
...Of course I liked it. I am easy, actually. Very very easy. (...Though if the dragon hadn't been cute at first, I would also have been a bit disgruntled.) Come on, that movie was pretty much marketed to me, me, me. Or like, a boy version of me... but a boy version of me wouldn't have enjoyed the slashy bits (...unless he was bi... OMG I JUST THOUGHT OF MYSELF AS HOT AHAHAHAHAHLFakdjflkadjfdl;akj I WOULD SO DO IT WITH THE BI!BOY ME, GOD HELP ME... but then most of us would... probably... maybe...). Anyway, that got a little off track. But just so you don't take me too seriously or anything (...that wasn't a danger to those of you who know me, I realize, but then there's metafandom... grar....)
I really don't feel like doing a 'standard' review; besides, there's not much to say-- either you like this sort of movie (cheesy fantasy, I mean-- what do you mean 'non-cheesy fantasy', THAT DOESN'T EXIST IN HOLLYWOOD... not counting LoTR but yeah). It wasn't quite painfully lame-- though of course my favorite bits were Eragon playing with the baby dragon (awwww) 'cause I got pretty annoyed at her preachy voice later on... plus she's cuter smaller, and I felt gypped of gradual growth, whether or not that's canon-- and that bit where he was wrestling with his brother (INCESTY!!! okay, in my depraved, sordid little mind, okay). And of course (do you doubt it??!) the bits with Tall, Dark & Handsome (TDH for short); yes, I AM that predictable. The princess was pretty, but had zero real personality-- hell, most characters had little more than hints at personality, it's just that I particularly like the stereotype TDH stands for (mmm, Sirius... mmm, SIRIUS WHO LOVES DRAGONS & FIGHTS WITH SWORDS... DAMMIT WHY ISN'T THAT GUY THE MAIN HERO, WHYWHYWHYWHY... I mean, okay, that's my hormones speaking, BUT STILL).
Back to TDH [...yes, the only person whose name I remember is Eragon, and even that I had to look up... my memory isn't the best for some things, yes]... I noticed him immediately (when he was lurking by the fortune teller... who btw was THE most unlikely casting choice for a fortune teller EVAR!!1). I don't usually notice walk-ons or characters with no lines, but... god, this hot, gothy suspicious-looking guy <3333 I WAS SLASHING THEM IMMEDIATELY, ahahahahaha THAT IS BECAUSE I HAVE NO SHAME :D :D :D :D :D
Sadly, there's not much to -say- about TDH except he looks hot in leather(!!!), he was the most amusing and believably conflicted character(!!) and also the most mysterious [in an interesting way, as in, things we don't know yet but should find out]. I was like OMG OMG YESSS when he started helping at the castle. Dude. I was totally on board for a wild affair between him & Eragon if he -was- a bad guy (or a really hot chaotic-neutral magician out for himself, rather... yessss) but I totally got on board with the helping, too. It brings him along, that's what counts. MAN. Thinking about it, I like TDH even more in retrospect than I did as I watched, and I liked TDH a LOT :D :D If you know what I mean ;;)
Okay, so like... by the end, I grew more disappointed in Eragon's lameness, and was questioning his future as suitable consort for TDH... especially since I kept overlaying him with Sirius. I started to be like 'well, maybe what he needs is a nice, pale, bookish repressed fellow who dabbles in the dark arts or is possessed or something... OMG YESSSSSS!!' I AM SO SAD :D I think because the movie was so slow/predictable/cheesy, I couldn't help but fixate on these things, y'know? Without that added enjoyment, I probably wouldn't have enjoyed 'Eragon' nearly as much as I did, 'cause the dragon/rider relationship was juuuust this side of hokey/unbelievable (and I usually melt at lifebond stuff like the SAP YOU ALL KNOW I AM), and Eragon himself... is not my type. There, I said it -.-;;
Actually, I was thinking about how archetypal/by-the-book this story is, and to some extent of course I do take pleasure in that familiarity-- I've seen a zillion characters like Eragon, a zillion plots like this-- and that's reassuring and nice to a rabid fangirl.
I was actually thinking about how Eragon's behavior kept being commented on in that 'oh, we're so post-modern & psycho-analytical' meta fashion, like how he was '3 parts fool & 1 part brave', and y'know... damn. That's your basic Gryffindor, isn't it? And it's hard not to love Gryffindors for that sheer exuberant heroic energy (...it's just that Eragon had bad lines and the guy couldn't act very well, mostly), and I think what that sort of character needs is support from a wiser Gryffindor & a Ravenclaw, 'cause a bitter jaded Slytherin type will just bring him down. Though Eragon needed the knock upside the head, of course he did. I was actually so hoping TDH would turn out to be a cool, methodical & calculating Slyth-type (what with the skulking & the black... mm) but then he turned out to be a sort of Slyth-to-Gryff hybrid which is suuuuuper sexeh & EVEN BETTER! >:D
In any case, all the '...you are so stupid' commentary poor Eragon got (...all true, I mean, he WAS, I just don't think they went about telling him the right way... not that he would've listened no matter how he was told, 'cause he's the show-don't-tell-me type)-- all that reminded me of the Slyth-fans' commentary on the Gryffindors and stuff in HP, which is what was running through my head in the background as I watched, heheh. It added another level of amusement, definitely. I was just feeling all sentimental 'cause... aww, we need our Gryffindors to save us [in the epic/sword-swinging sense] 'cause a Ravenclaw would just try to research it to death & a Slytherin would be like 'ummm, I'll just wait over here & help you out later-- you go on! go on!!' & a Hufflepuff (like Eragon's bro) would be like '...um, I wanna go farm somewhere, see you later okay?? I love you!! Be strong! Toodaloo!'
Anyway, what I mean is that you need Gryffindors to start revolutions & uh, move the plot forward, and plus they're all fiery & cute <3. In theory ^^;;;;; In other words, I wish someone had a role that involved making light of typically Ravenclaw or Slytherin-type behavior, but then Gryffs are too, uh, banter-challenged, generally (unless they're COOL and/or written well, unlike Eragon -and- Mr Ex-Rider Guy).... um :>
I liked the -look- of the dragon, btw (...though yeah, I pretty much hated her personality, a rarity for me)... looks just like the covers (...duh), but it's good. Almost as good as the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles preview, BUT NOT QUITE. ^^;;; But then, one shouldn't try & compete with a classic, I suppose...
~~
Speaking of Something Completely Different, I've been thinking (in my messy, random, drawn-out way) about gender roles lately (...and how much I hate their existence & why, etcetc), and it's just kind of funny how it's also evident in porn, of all things. In fact, I could write some sort of essay in gender roles in porn, seriously. I'm mostly thinking of the difference between [amateur] lesbian porn (which is obviously geared towards the Male Gaze™-- thanks, Phil 101!-- 'cause they're dressed up, made up, and play with 'male' objects/roles) and [amateur] gay stuff, which is all about enjoying Teh Cock & getting off. That is like, what's wrong with society today, right there :D ...or maybe it's just Nature :P Either way, annoying both because men aren't more talky/emotional & 'cause women keep being objectified EVEN BY THEMSELVES, HOLY CHRIST. Not that men aren't all self-promoting about their hot muscles, but it's -their- pleasure, not the viewers', y'know? Augh.
You know, I realize I ought to take more care about what I say-- like, having it make sense, proofing it against obvious logic holes & inconsistencies... BUT I CAN'T BE BOTHERED :(( Woe. I'm like '....okay, yes it annoys me when I'm like 'damn, this isn't where I wanted this to go', but ahhhh it's even more bothersome to constantly think of what the reader response would be to any given idea/phrasing'. You may wonder why I bother with -livejournal- if this is just pointless blather, but... well, there's always the off chance someone will know exactly what I mean without me having to actually... explain it -.-;;; SOMETIMES THIS HAPPENS, okay :> Probably too often, or I would've learned more discipline by now -.- ...Yes, I just got in trouble over my casual inaccurate-seeming Sentinel fandom reference... heh Funny 'cause I wasn't really inaccurate [the way I meant what I said], it's just that I didn't bother specifying exactly how I meant what I said, which did sound wrong, but yeah.....
I can only imagine the people who naturally envision readers' responses to anything they write o_0 Ahhhh, godlike powers I shall never [care enough to] possess.... -.-;;;; Ah, it's not that I don't care about accuracy in theory; it's the explaining stuff that's the problem. (...And the other thing is that I -know- being like this makes me seem stupider than [I think] I really am, but even so...... heh I really should learn to communicate more clearly if I wanna get anywhere in life or as a writer, though, I knooooow. Or maybe I should feel special 'cause I've never met anyone consciously lazy about this in this manner; I mean, people either do meta or make some effort to make sense/make a real argument-- at least I feel pretty unique in being unable to either stop thinking Deep Thoughts™ or like... um, be serious/thorough about it.)
ANYWAY, I saw Eragon!! Woo-hoo! :D :D :D And btw, no, I didn't read it. I, uh, don't tend to like most creature features, like dragon!fantasy, specifically. Or vampire!fantasy, werewolf!fantasy, and most people's ideas of unicorns are lame too. Yeah, I know that... uh, doesn't leave a lot of fantasy to go around, and now you know why I was bitter early on in my life as much as now. Anyway, the reason I don't like these is just that everyone else does and therefore they get fucked with the most. Fantasy publishers should really be thankful I like mythic plots, princesses/princes, magicians of all shapes & colors, assassins, gods & priests, warrior mages & supernatural!cops, archetypal arcs & characterizations and of course-- of course!!-- ELVES, ELVES BABY!!1
One thing this movie proved (as I kept writing mini!fanfics for it in my head AS I WATCHED) is that the reason I don't write beyond HP much is that there are simply no other big high fantasy fandoms on lj :)) AHAHAH. *facepalm* Everything is so simple :D
...Of course I liked it. I am easy, actually. Very very easy. (...Though if the dragon hadn't been cute at first, I would also have been a bit disgruntled.) Come on, that movie was pretty much marketed to me, me, me. Or like, a boy version of me... but a boy version of me wouldn't have enjoyed the slashy bits (...unless he was bi... OMG I JUST THOUGHT OF MYSELF AS HOT AHAHAHAHAHLFakdjflkadjfdl;akj I WOULD SO DO IT WITH THE BI!BOY ME, GOD HELP ME... but then most of us would... probably... maybe...). Anyway, that got a little off track. But just so you don't take me too seriously or anything (...that wasn't a danger to those of you who know me, I realize, but then there's metafandom... grar....)
I really don't feel like doing a 'standard' review; besides, there's not much to say-- either you like this sort of movie (cheesy fantasy, I mean-- what do you mean 'non-cheesy fantasy', THAT DOESN'T EXIST IN HOLLYWOOD... not counting LoTR but yeah). It wasn't quite painfully lame-- though of course my favorite bits were Eragon playing with the baby dragon (awwww) 'cause I got pretty annoyed at her preachy voice later on... plus she's cuter smaller, and I felt gypped of gradual growth, whether or not that's canon-- and that bit where he was wrestling with his brother (INCESTY!!! okay, in my depraved, sordid little mind, okay). And of course (do you doubt it??!) the bits with Tall, Dark & Handsome (TDH for short); yes, I AM that predictable. The princess was pretty, but had zero real personality-- hell, most characters had little more than hints at personality, it's just that I particularly like the stereotype TDH stands for (mmm, Sirius... mmm, SIRIUS WHO LOVES DRAGONS & FIGHTS WITH SWORDS... DAMMIT WHY ISN'T THAT GUY THE MAIN HERO, WHYWHYWHYWHY... I mean, okay, that's my hormones speaking, BUT STILL).
Back to TDH [...yes, the only person whose name I remember is Eragon, and even that I had to look up... my memory isn't the best for some things, yes]... I noticed him immediately (when he was lurking by the fortune teller... who btw was THE most unlikely casting choice for a fortune teller EVAR!!1). I don't usually notice walk-ons or characters with no lines, but... god, this hot, gothy suspicious-looking guy <3333 I WAS SLASHING THEM IMMEDIATELY, ahahahahaha THAT IS BECAUSE I HAVE NO SHAME :D :D :D :D :D
Sadly, there's not much to -say- about TDH except he looks hot in leather(!!!), he was the most amusing and believably conflicted character(!!) and also the most mysterious [in an interesting way, as in, things we don't know yet but should find out]. I was like OMG OMG YESSS when he started helping at the castle. Dude. I was totally on board for a wild affair between him & Eragon if he -was- a bad guy (or a really hot chaotic-neutral magician out for himself, rather... yessss) but I totally got on board with the helping, too. It brings him along, that's what counts. MAN. Thinking about it, I like TDH even more in retrospect than I did as I watched, and I liked TDH a LOT :D :D If you know what I mean ;;)
Okay, so like... by the end, I grew more disappointed in Eragon's lameness, and was questioning his future as suitable consort for TDH... especially since I kept overlaying him with Sirius. I started to be like 'well, maybe what he needs is a nice, pale, bookish repressed fellow who dabbles in the dark arts or is possessed or something... OMG YESSSSSS!!' I AM SO SAD :D I think because the movie was so slow/predictable/cheesy, I couldn't help but fixate on these things, y'know? Without that added enjoyment, I probably wouldn't have enjoyed 'Eragon' nearly as much as I did, 'cause the dragon/rider relationship was juuuust this side of hokey/unbelievable (and I usually melt at lifebond stuff like the SAP YOU ALL KNOW I AM), and Eragon himself... is not my type. There, I said it -.-;;
Actually, I was thinking about how archetypal/by-the-book this story is, and to some extent of course I do take pleasure in that familiarity-- I've seen a zillion characters like Eragon, a zillion plots like this-- and that's reassuring and nice to a rabid fangirl.
I was actually thinking about how Eragon's behavior kept being commented on in that 'oh, we're so post-modern & psycho-analytical' meta fashion, like how he was '3 parts fool & 1 part brave', and y'know... damn. That's your basic Gryffindor, isn't it? And it's hard not to love Gryffindors for that sheer exuberant heroic energy (...it's just that Eragon had bad lines and the guy couldn't act very well, mostly), and I think what that sort of character needs is support from a wiser Gryffindor & a Ravenclaw, 'cause a bitter jaded Slytherin type will just bring him down. Though Eragon needed the knock upside the head, of course he did. I was actually so hoping TDH would turn out to be a cool, methodical & calculating Slyth-type (what with the skulking & the black... mm) but then he turned out to be a sort of Slyth-to-Gryff hybrid which is suuuuuper sexeh & EVEN BETTER! >:D
In any case, all the '...you are so stupid' commentary poor Eragon got (...all true, I mean, he WAS, I just don't think they went about telling him the right way... not that he would've listened no matter how he was told, 'cause he's the show-don't-tell-me type)-- all that reminded me of the Slyth-fans' commentary on the Gryffindors and stuff in HP, which is what was running through my head in the background as I watched, heheh. It added another level of amusement, definitely. I was just feeling all sentimental 'cause... aww, we need our Gryffindors to save us [in the epic/sword-swinging sense] 'cause a Ravenclaw would just try to research it to death & a Slytherin would be like 'ummm, I'll just wait over here & help you out later-- you go on! go on!!' & a Hufflepuff (like Eragon's bro) would be like '...um, I wanna go farm somewhere, see you later okay?? I love you!! Be strong! Toodaloo!'
Anyway, what I mean is that you need Gryffindors to start revolutions & uh, move the plot forward, and plus they're all fiery & cute <3. In theory ^^;;;;; In other words, I wish someone had a role that involved making light of typically Ravenclaw or Slytherin-type behavior, but then Gryffs are too, uh, banter-challenged, generally (unless they're COOL and/or written well, unlike Eragon -and- Mr Ex-Rider Guy).... um :>
I liked the -look- of the dragon, btw (...though yeah, I pretty much hated her personality, a rarity for me)... looks just like the covers (...duh), but it's good. Almost as good as the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles preview, BUT NOT QUITE. ^^;;; But then, one shouldn't try & compete with a classic, I suppose...
~~
Speaking of Something Completely Different, I've been thinking (in my messy, random, drawn-out way) about gender roles lately (...and how much I hate their existence & why, etcetc), and it's just kind of funny how it's also evident in porn, of all things. In fact, I could write some sort of essay in gender roles in porn, seriously. I'm mostly thinking of the difference between [amateur] lesbian porn (which is obviously geared towards the Male Gaze™-- thanks, Phil 101!-- 'cause they're dressed up, made up, and play with 'male' objects/roles) and [amateur] gay stuff, which is all about enjoying Teh Cock & getting off. That is like, what's wrong with society today, right there :D ...or maybe it's just Nature :P Either way, annoying both because men aren't more talky/emotional & 'cause women keep being objectified EVEN BY THEMSELVES, HOLY CHRIST. Not that men aren't all self-promoting about their hot muscles, but it's -their- pleasure, not the viewers', y'know? Augh.
