[but who said good writers get laid, anyway?]

It appears I'd upset a friend when he'd wrote a poem to me (but not about me... er) years ago, and I laughed (though I don't remember it) and/or was harsh about critiquing it, and er... he'd apparently never wrote me a poem again after that -.- I know this because he wrote his current girlfriend one and she loved it (in that OMG NO ONE HAS EVER DONE THIS FOR ME, IT'S SO DEEP AND MEANINGFUL ZOMG!!1 sort of way) and he read it to me to check if she was biased or it was really amazing, ahahaha -.- Well, I mean, it wasn't -bad-, but... okay, a bit hokey, but with good imagery at times, and... somehow I feel I'm missing the point. He also said the cheesy first line about her tears and eyes, etcetc, was meant to press a button & was personal. (...Okay....)

This got me to thinking about how I am with fanfic in general too-- especially harsh with my closest friends, all that jazz, and also how I refuse to give the whole "it's personal to me" or "it's just for my/your pleasure" philosophy the time of day (in that whole 'if you're not perfectionist about your pleasure, that's not -my- problem' sort of way). I mean, I really -should- care about your (general 'your') pleasure and yet, somehow I don't. Haha, I care about -my- pleasure, and my pleasure is (what I see as) good writing, and I'm just rather an uncompromising bitch about that. -.-

I don't know what my point is. I feel bad that he's felt bad about my being harsh that one time, but not bad enough not to be unapologetic on some level. I mean, I don't -lie-, basically-- if it's great, I'm sincere. If it's not-so-great... I'm also sincere. And yeah, so maybe I'm a bit masochistic in reading the things that hurt my soul in the first place, but on the other hand, I still feel 'don't like it, don't read it' is a cop-out-- how would I know it's not good before I read it? And how do I know it's not good until I read a good bit of it, in fact...? And then, once you've invested that bit of your time-- well, you get to be bitter, is what I'm saying. You get to be very very bitter. ^^;
    If people hated me for this, I suppose I'd become even more antisocial than I already am, that's all, but I think(??) most people who know me take it as just me being me, or something.

Still, excusing cheesy lame lines as being 'personal' just strikes me as hilarious. As if -every- story, -every- line, -every- word in -every- creative thing you write shouldn't be personal. Duh. That's no excuse for being a shitty writer, though it -is-, in fact, something that will get you laid, I guess.

Oh, and did I mention feedback? It will also get you feedback. ('Bring me the cheese, if you please,' the masses cry. 'Oh yes, thank you,' they add. 'We will adore you and be your slave now, kthnxbi.' 'Tis the way of the world, methinks....)