Mar. 30th, 2003

reenka: (Default)
sara wrote h/d pr0n and i adore it with all my heart-- but i've only read a quarter of it, early in the afternoon. then i had to catch the bus and i -still- haven't gotten back to it. it's always, "just one more thing, and then". my life is a never-ending series of "and then's". naturally, that's neither here nor there. i think eventually, i will write more dumbledore, just because the idea of him amuses me greatly-- but maybe not. i think i can definitely be pompously humorous. heh.

anyway. i wondered (randomly), why is it that depression, narcissism and bipolar disorder are so predominant in the mental disorders hp characters get. i mean-- the possibilities are rather more expansive. there is paranoia, obsessive-compulsive disorder, schizoid disorders of many kinds, phobias aplenty, panic attacks, eating disorders, dementia... heh.
    i'm getting the weirdest sense of deja-vu. like i'm sure i've said this before. in particular, i was fascinated with the idea of like, harry getting extreme paranoia, and building a plot around that. that would just be great. ahahaha, and yeah, obsessive-compulsive harry also strikes me as priceless. also, obsessive-compulsive hermione seems almost natural, heh. also, draco. hee, a lint obsession, or a dust obsession. he could freak out and get a panic attack if someone disturbed his hair. he could secretly have to wash his hands 20 times a day. he could polish his shoes right before bed, and set a spell to wake him at 4:15am because he needs to watch the moon right then in order to make sure the voices go away for another day. heh.

another curiosity is why there isn't more use of `obliviate' as a plot-device. it seems so obvious. i mean, plenty of imperius and crucio and polyjuice and floo powder, all very interesting spells, but no love for obliviating. i mean, yes, -some- fics use it to effect, but mostly it's only used in a straight-forward repetitive sense-- as in, let's just repeat this plot-point over and over, like a rewind button that's stuck on "wash, rinse, repeat". it's the most frustrating thing ever, usually.
    and now to get to the point of this post, which was my exciting new use for obliviating. not. )
   EDIT - mmm, draco/fish. yesssss, mah prettie, and fish you -shall- :D
~~

also.
why would non-fandom people add this journal? not that i -mind-. but sigh. all i talk about are in-jokey type things, it seems (well, here anyway). *boggles*.
    EDIT - in honor of not being fannish (er... yah), i decided to post a non-fannish pic!

happy spring, everyone! :) )
reenka: (Default)
perhaps one just could never explain what attracts you to a concept, and maybe reality and likelihood and sanity have nothing to do with it. there is that strange alchemy in the brain-- mine, anyway-- where a very abstract ideal of unity that really has nothing to do with "real life" can manifest itself in terms of people. of course, the truth is, people are just people. they're not representations of ideals (or ideas, for that matter) of love, and they're not some sort of case study in philosophical predestination and the symmetries of the universe. i mean, or are they?

well, in the obvious way, they're not. if you think ideas do manifest themselves in reality, merely by the transferrence between all things-- ie, that there's a certain interchange between what we think and what we are, and what the world is-- then maybe.

i like to think of love as a triumph of imagination. as a story we tell ourselves. because in the end, how we see other people is simply a reflection of how we see ourselves. and how we see ourselves is an outgrowth of all sorts of things we've been told about the world and how we're supposed to be within it, and who we're supposed to act like and think like. some people love narrowly-- merely within the tightest circle of what they can see around them. and in fact, if you go outside of yourself far enough, if you go as far as you can and try to reach your opposing ends-- really, you just come back to yourself from the other side. so, there's no escaping, really, but perhaps there is an imagining of the cessation of the attempt. perhaps we can be at peace, merely by accepting everything we are as belonging to everything we're not.

am i making any sense? probably not.

er. but i keep trying, though. )
~~

EDIT - [livejournal.com profile] addictedkitten? ahahaha. i finally found a harry/draco snogging pic i don't think you have~! (i know. sad. sad. that i'm so excited, yes). but still! yesssss! :D
    and another! hee. also. squeeeee~! *snerks*

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