~~we can be Heroes, just for one day

that song (and david bowie) so, so kick serious ass. ahem.

so. i was reading te's hp recs page, just because i was curious... so i come across this take on draco:

``Essentially, you take a character whose canon world is, at the very least, very grey, and twist, fold, spindle, and mutilate things until the dark character is just, well, misunderstood."

i *heart* unapologetic!draco. heh. yeah. draco gets no lovin', in those other fandoms, but at least you can be sure they don't wax sentimental about him. snape does, though. he gets a lotta lovin'. alan rickman, they should never have cast you ^^;;

i can think of a -lot- of (otherwise good) fics where the writer sort of... fiddles with the whole canon!draco image of bastard-git-bigot-son-of-deatheaters thing. do we forgive him 'cause he's cute? actually-- as far as me personally-- i just like snarky intolerant pathetic bastards (spike, anyone?? ha). i think they're adorable and all that this needs to become a situation comedy is a harry who isn't sympathetic, takes no bullshit, is horribly attracted to him, but doesn't give an inch (oh, and is also snarky). to me, that's like, a perfect life (or sitcom, what have you). comedy, tragedy, take your pick, really.

this fits in interestingly with my recent response to a story by hackthis where harry's a self-pitying, wilting legend, post-hogwarts. harry as legend, sure, but malfoy doesn't really cut it as Mythic Antagonist. of course, the antagonist isn't what most people try to make draco be. it's more-- um-- the Outsider, or the Fool. well, harry's more the fool (more obviously), but draco's progression's more in question. what we're really going for is the anti-hero-- whereas the hero's quest is assured to come to some sort of satisfying end (don't say, but it's not, because we all know that jkr isn't gonna just let voldemort win, no matter how much more risque and artistic it might be). kind of, the double-journey-- the ways we can make mistakes without even knowing better as well as the mistakes we make when we just try to do ``the right thing".

i think it's actually not that interesting to see draco as some sort of tragic, semi-evil, "dark" figure. not any more than it's interesting to see harry as Hero. even though he -is- a hero, heroes can be a lot of things, most of them contradictory and well-intentioned-but-sadly-misguided. the only thing that distinguishes heroes from... regular characters, is a sense of Destiny, i think. this destiny doesn't have a whole lot to do with your personality, but is something thrust upon you, that you may or may not live up to.

this is illustrated by the whole `boy who lived' thing. he has an identity, a Hero's Identity that has absolutely -nothing- to do with who he is (or even, apparently, with his own innate magical powers, so far). harry's all, "ok i'll do it" and that's what tends to make a hero. you like to go against the grain-- you think you're rebelling and breaking the rules, but really you're -fulfilling- the rules, and are the most implacable -tool- of the `rules' of destiny. he's all about being gryffindor, and rebellion and courage, and yet he only does what he has to, and he doesn't always succeed, and is constantly being manipulated.

the interesting thing about draco (this is veering sharply from anything canon), to me anyway, is the way he -could- be the hero, but his choice to be would be entirely his own. he is being steered entirely in a different direction, and he appears not to mind. anything he does would be a direct extension of his will-- more than harry, more than snape, more than anyone, what he does could make a difference, and it would be a difference made by choice, by an exercise of will. he has to face all the darkness inside him, and there's no way he could ever really avoid it or outgrow it entirely, or sweep it under the rug. draco is all about our hope that heroes aren't really about Destiny, but rather about Will. unlike with harry, all the darkness is out in the open. no one would support him in this, no one would believe in him. what he does is entirely up to him.

this is really reminiscent, to me, of the general themes explored so interestingly in X (the anime series), between kamui and subaru and fuuma. who is the dark, and who is the light? whose is the choice, and whose is the Destiny? i find this fascinating. maybe you can say that draco is too two-dimensional to bear the burden of the Hero's Shadow and/or anti-hero and/or Hero, but really-- why do you need to just take things at face value? as a snarky bigoted idiot he has few uses, and like te said, the only reason to pair him with harry would be because he's of age, and pretty, and they hate each other, which is sexy. pairing them like this would indeed indicate a short-lived, regret-filled sort of relationship which burns out fast. a lot-- a lot of the best stories do more with draco, while keeping him in character.

harry's checkmate. harry's shadow. harry's conscience, even. harry's reflection-- all of these things. in my harry potter class this summer, we were going through the major archetypes and assigning hp characters to them. when we got to the Antagonist or Shadow, no one but me really chose draco. they were all like, voldemort or snape(!) or hagrid(!) or whatever. if -draco- is shallow, i think voldemort is even more shallow-- first of all, he's a closed book, he's not going to change to the suspense and development of the story is minimal. secondly, we -know- he turned evil, so the whole kamui/fuuma dilemma is a foregone conclusion and the only question is, can harry resist the Dark Side and hold on tight to the goodness inside him-- we don't question voldemort's fate, and don't have a lot of sympathy for him, (tom riddle is a different question, but tom riddle is in the past)-- and this sympathy is essential.

what i'd like to see is a parallel to harry. what i'd like to see is someone who's beyond destiny, who chooses freely, and hopefully, still uses his power to redeem rather than destroy. there's more to learn from draco. we are more like draco, really, than we are like harry, at least, more obviously. harry was born with everyone knowing what he was-- so was draco-- but harry has nothing of consequence to prevent him from becoming that which he was always meant to be beyond the stress of being the only one dealing with the responsibility. he could -crack-, but if he doesn't, he is what he is. it's sort of dull.

anyway. that was kind of... er... random, but if any of you were desperate for meta-hp talk, i'm glad i could be of service.
~~

so a quiz says i'm a tragic romantic. (``something in your life is terribly impossible...") i'm procrastinating right now, and random thoughts are coming to me to stave off the flood of guilt. it's so disturbing, having to be yourself, having to deal with your own life all the time-- like, it just-- never goes away. you wish it would, but it doesn't-- just the same old thing, same old issues, all the time. if i wasn't into imagining things, i'd really be unreasonably angry at existence a lot, i think...

oh wait, i used to do that anyway ^^;;
being who you are sometimes seems terribly impossible. me and willow, we're peas in a pod (*manic laughter*)
~~
it's weird how many a brilliant author i haven't even -heard- of, writing h/d slash. negative image seems to fit beautifully into my rantings, and actually, makes me feel like i'd rather have written this than the preceding blather, by far. it's just-- haunting, and sexy, and just-- breath-stealing. and wow i'm reccing something that's not from someone on livejournal, will wonders never cease ^^;; i've seen the polyjuice/mirror theme done before, but never so well as this. just-- delicious. ok, not the most thought-out review, but, it's so, so exactly what i want-- a fantasy that bites back. that's what it's all about *grins*

there's theme and variation, which made me want to cry with the simple use of the name, ``harry". just-- gahd. the weirdest things can feel so... heart-wrenching. names, for instance. just read it.

then there's kat's shooting lessons, which is set in the snitch!-verse, and is also sexay and delicious and makes me eat my words about all that draco-as-shadow stuff and start yelling ``just shag already!!", which is what it's all about anyway (if i were honest, heh). and of course, filios, the most believable abused!draco yet. this just proves (the polyjuice fic and the abuse fic) that there's no cliche bad enough that you can't make it good, if only you ... twist and tuck, so to speak. yum, and add some s-e-x appeal *grins*
~~
( disgusting. yes another test says i'm a healer. urgh. where's the genghis khan in me, dammit??! why can't i be fiery and fearsome?? *cries* )