~~fandom history & wibbling on the horrors of communal bonding

dunno why i wrote the following (but do know thinking 'bout stuff was inspired by meeting everyone-- well, kind of-- in the armchair list chat). i just wanted to figure out the strangeness of... fandom-as-a-bunch-of-people-i-like. rather than fandom-as-a-bunch-of-authors-i-like. because i'm skittish about feeling attached to anything online whatsoever-- bad past karma-- and yet-- and yet i don't see why i should really fight it. theoretically one could have a balanced existence, and let things happen as they may, and just sort of have a good time & meet people & read fic & relax.

last time i liked a group of individuals this much, was on the poetry channel at irc. some of them i got to know, and some of them i got really attached to, and the ones i got attached to, i got too attached to (well, doesn't help that they were flakey bastards), and the others, i didn't connect with enough, so it was always a sort of half-way friendship that kind of makes one nostalgic over nothing. i get nostalgic and emotionally attached too easily. try to avoid it. try to find a place to belong, then run away when it seems it could almost happen-- well i mean, online-- online doesn't seem like a good place to hang your hat.

so somehow this lent itself to my so-called Fandom History (combing through the not-so-distant past to come to terms with the present). and thus we have my account of ( ...the Summer of Potter... )

~~fic alert...! ack. & other rantings

i'm like, so wired. before i was tense. so i wrote a ficlet... yes, a ficlet..!! read, read pleasepleaseplease (*dies*)... er....here:

||~~Luminary~~||

this is for vanityfair, even though it's not worthy, i was so so stoked hearing her sing 'luminous crush', and i just had to write something inspired by it, and somewhat inspired by a reference to heero staring into the sun. ahh... perfect. i love that image. anyway. lotsa staring and curses and silences and hate and love and...stuff. yeah.

i'm so, so wired. gahd. before, i was tense, so i wrote that, but... then i had some soda... and now... *sighs* i should not be in public labs under these circumstances, consulting (i feel more like snarling and spinning and going lalalalala... but. i can't. am important answerer-of-questions person). ahem. and like, it's so cool 'cause i so so love giving aja something even though it's not much, but i sososo love `love under will', i doidoidoidoido. .... i do.... ~:) *wired bouncing*

um. yes. i need to mention this, i do, i do, i doidoidoidoido..!

silviakundera has killed me once again. with this fic-- and it wasn't even pointy..! or long..! or... well... h/d...! (what is the world coming to???! *screams for effect* [remember, i'm wired, don't harass the wired person])

twincest. i have now loffed (and fangirled..!) twincest. in the play format (i greatly dislike and never read the play format if i can help it. ah yes. see pure dialogue and stage cues... see reena run. run, reena, run..!) is nothing sacred???!! but..! i will NOT, i repeat not read ginny and/or hermione with draco and/or harry. no matter who writes it...er... well...*wibbles*... er.... ok, unless it's cassandra claire. i'm working up to it *sticks out tongue* but. but no one else..! ack..! there's only so much i can take, ya know.....


and now for something completely different...
( um. here i go on about my take on wiccans & weird mormon people talking on the bus... yah. )