well, we all knew that [i wasn't stable] o_0
well i was going on about how tom of finland art convinced me that i don't like "manly men" or overt testosterone, etc etc. but then a very important question was asked of me: what do you think of genghis khan??
and i was like, YES, because i love genghis khan. i mean, i think wild-haired fierce-looking men in weird get-up yelling and screaming as they run, waving their sword (ok so maybe he didn't do that, but i bet he did in his younger days... ahem)-- i think they're sexay. i like warriors. i like swords & men on horseback & archers & xena: the warrior princess except with balls (even though she has balls *laughs*)
so. my only problem is with prissy imposters, who have short hair and artificial "i-work-out" muscles and an uptight attitude. they march in the ranks, they don't wave swords. they bark "yessir" instead of screaming, "diiiiie, infiiiidelllll!!" hee~:)
so i don't dislike testosterone after all. i tend to like mental agility vs physical, and mental swordplay rather than actual-- true. but, i like aggressiveness & courage & insane rage & all that good stuff. i find clean-cut guys with short hair, "tough attitudes", well-ironed uniforms and stuffy handshakes, boring and kind of a turn-off. of course, it's not like you'll find me seeking out Mr Wild Fabio, either, heh. i don't like affectation, and i find the modern idea of Masculinity an affectation-- and unlike the old idea of Womanhood, where women wore huge skirts and curtsied, it's not even remotely aesthetically pleasing. it's all fake and stupid. real warriors would laugh at them and their kinks. hmf :)
~~
the frosh are out in force today. oo, scary.
saw sept. 11 poetry up posted on a bulletin board. it was.... weird, reading it.
i was taken, again, by how hurt a lot of us were by this. and wondered, again, what that meant. do we, in fact, love each other? i mean, people in general. or is it just that the ones that do, are the vocal ones, in times like this?
i want to believe it. that it's true. that really, all this bickering is a front, and if it were to be ripped away, you'd see us bleeding, and needing each other, and being sorry we never said it while there was time. it really touched me, and it does still, all the displays of unity. i never see it, really-- all the unity is usually within one's own little sub-group, whatever you identify with. but then-- it was like, yeah we all do care. & we'll never admit it ourselves unless it was ripped away-- like a scab-- & we can't help crying.
~~
( so here goes my old `oh god, was i making-believe i liked [reading slash about] actual males, whereas really i was just transplanting femaleness onto them, because that Tough-Guy-in-Uniform manly ideal really makes me sick', rant-type-thing... )
well i was going on about how tom of finland art convinced me that i don't like "manly men" or overt testosterone, etc etc. but then a very important question was asked of me: what do you think of genghis khan??
and i was like, YES, because i love genghis khan. i mean, i think wild-haired fierce-looking men in weird get-up yelling and screaming as they run, waving their sword (ok so maybe he didn't do that, but i bet he did in his younger days... ahem)-- i think they're sexay. i like warriors. i like swords & men on horseback & archers & xena: the warrior princess except with balls (even though she has balls *laughs*)
so. my only problem is with prissy imposters, who have short hair and artificial "i-work-out" muscles and an uptight attitude. they march in the ranks, they don't wave swords. they bark "yessir" instead of screaming, "diiiiie, infiiiidelllll!!" hee~:)
so i don't dislike testosterone after all. i tend to like mental agility vs physical, and mental swordplay rather than actual-- true. but, i like aggressiveness & courage & insane rage & all that good stuff. i find clean-cut guys with short hair, "tough attitudes", well-ironed uniforms and stuffy handshakes, boring and kind of a turn-off. of course, it's not like you'll find me seeking out Mr Wild Fabio, either, heh. i don't like affectation, and i find the modern idea of Masculinity an affectation-- and unlike the old idea of Womanhood, where women wore huge skirts and curtsied, it's not even remotely aesthetically pleasing. it's all fake and stupid. real warriors would laugh at them and their kinks. hmf :)
~~
the frosh are out in force today. oo, scary.
saw sept. 11 poetry up posted on a bulletin board. it was.... weird, reading it.
i was taken, again, by how hurt a lot of us were by this. and wondered, again, what that meant. do we, in fact, love each other? i mean, people in general. or is it just that the ones that do, are the vocal ones, in times like this?
i want to believe it. that it's true. that really, all this bickering is a front, and if it were to be ripped away, you'd see us bleeding, and needing each other, and being sorry we never said it while there was time. it really touched me, and it does still, all the displays of unity. i never see it, really-- all the unity is usually within one's own little sub-group, whatever you identify with. but then-- it was like, yeah we all do care. & we'll never admit it ourselves unless it was ripped away-- like a scab-- & we can't help crying.
~~
( so here goes my old `oh god, was i making-believe i liked [reading slash about] actual males, whereas really i was just transplanting femaleness onto them, because that Tough-Guy-in-Uniform manly ideal really makes me sick', rant-type-thing... )
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