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reenkaThings I love about stories & fanfic & H/D & stuff:
- The way sometimes you read something and you don't want to like it, and it goes against everything you think you enjoy, but you love it. Something about the way the characters and situations are -human- is so universal, it breaks you. Their emotions are so intense, their bond so vivid, you think nothing else can matter except that they are together like this always.
- The way these stories have this hope, this genuine faith in the beauty of love, worked inside them.
- The way I feel angry at and afraid for and in love with characters and how their pain matters more to me than my own-- their pain -is- my pain.
- The way words are beautiful, as beautiful as colors and trees and oceans-- the way I can see the universe through glimpsing it in pieces of story. So this story would be a magnet for everything beautiful and painful and strange and doomed, and it should break me but it doesn't. It makes me feel alive more intensely than ever.
- The way love can triumph and self-awareness can lead to transcendence and anger can turn to passion can turn to need can turn to exultation. Thinking that we can be our best selves when we let go of the past; thinking that's possible. One can fall in love with the future. With the wonder and the unknowability and the sheer potential of it. The potential for love to remake the world in its image-- that is H/D.
- The way they (Harry & Draco) use words to wound each other and use their hands to heal each other. The duality of them right to the center-- love and hatred is an oversimplification. The way passion can be a kaleidoscope of contradictory emotion which makes no sense, and yet makes the only sort of sense.
- The way these stories make them combust in my mind, like stirring embers-- the way I feed off so many people's fanfics, gather the emotion to fuel my own. The way I feel at its best, we're writing fics in response to each other-- a dialogue about passion and need and growth and destiny. What it means to grow up and how can you love the things you feel you cannot.
- The way seeing them happy makes me happy. The way these stories make me -feel-. The way people can tell one story in so many ways. The way these stories constantly remind me of who I am but also who I -can- be. The ways they (Harry & Draco) couldn't-- shouldn't-- be able to connect, and they do. They can. And if the biggest tragedy of our lives is how disconnected we all are from each other, this is a fairy-tale we need. 'This is who I am and this is who I have been and this is who I always thought I would become' becomes 'this is what love has made me'.
- The way they're such boys, really. There's all this baggage and meta and idealism that they evoke in me, but the strongest thing is how -real- they feel to me, and how alive they are, all messy and unredeemed and 15, with their whole life ahead of them and their rage always battling with their need for love. The way I love them. The way these stories let me love them.
- The way sometimes you read something and you don't want to like it, and it goes against everything you think you enjoy, but you love it. Something about the way the characters and situations are -human- is so universal, it breaks you. Their emotions are so intense, their bond so vivid, you think nothing else can matter except that they are together like this always.
- The way these stories have this hope, this genuine faith in the beauty of love, worked inside them.
- The way I feel angry at and afraid for and in love with characters and how their pain matters more to me than my own-- their pain -is- my pain.
- The way words are beautiful, as beautiful as colors and trees and oceans-- the way I can see the universe through glimpsing it in pieces of story. So this story would be a magnet for everything beautiful and painful and strange and doomed, and it should break me but it doesn't. It makes me feel alive more intensely than ever.
- The way love can triumph and self-awareness can lead to transcendence and anger can turn to passion can turn to need can turn to exultation. Thinking that we can be our best selves when we let go of the past; thinking that's possible. One can fall in love with the future. With the wonder and the unknowability and the sheer potential of it. The potential for love to remake the world in its image-- that is H/D.
- The way they (Harry & Draco) use words to wound each other and use their hands to heal each other. The duality of them right to the center-- love and hatred is an oversimplification. The way passion can be a kaleidoscope of contradictory emotion which makes no sense, and yet makes the only sort of sense.
- The way these stories make them combust in my mind, like stirring embers-- the way I feed off so many people's fanfics, gather the emotion to fuel my own. The way I feel at its best, we're writing fics in response to each other-- a dialogue about passion and need and growth and destiny. What it means to grow up and how can you love the things you feel you cannot.
- The way seeing them happy makes me happy. The way these stories make me -feel-. The way people can tell one story in so many ways. The way these stories constantly remind me of who I am but also who I -can- be. The ways they (Harry & Draco) couldn't-- shouldn't-- be able to connect, and they do. They can. And if the biggest tragedy of our lives is how disconnected we all are from each other, this is a fairy-tale we need. 'This is who I am and this is who I have been and this is who I always thought I would become' becomes 'this is what love has made me'.
- The way they're such boys, really. There's all this baggage and meta and idealism that they evoke in me, but the strongest thing is how -real- they feel to me, and how alive they are, all messy and unredeemed and 15, with their whole life ahead of them and their rage always battling with their need for love. The way I love them. The way these stories let me love them.
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no subject
Date: 2004-06-29 11:19 pm (UTC)and i finally have, and there is this.
so now i just want to give you a big hug and tell you i am sorry, and say thank you, for this. this means a lot. and it's really quite beautifully expressed.
i don't know if that's enough, but i hope for tonight it is. i will try to reply again in the morning.
goodnight, reena. ♥
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Date: 2004-06-29 11:21 pm (UTC)The potential for love to remake the world in its image-- that is H/D.
Yes.
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Date: 2004-06-29 11:57 pm (UTC)goodnight. ♥
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Date: 2004-06-30 01:06 am (UTC)*Also, you used my favorite word. I love the way you write.
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Date: 2004-06-30 10:49 am (UTC)wah. not being bitter pays off :D
and now I want to know what your favorite word is :D
<3 <- i forgot the code for the little hearts
Date: 2004-06-30 10:59 am (UTC)You know, this is it exactly. Why want a ship that it's all about the hate, which for whatever clichè is all about the love? I am not bothered at the fact that Harry dismissed Draco so easily at the end of OotP. Draco's still a part of his life. A less simple part than an enemy.
The way love can triumph and self-awareness can lead to transcendence and anger can turn to passion can turn to need can turn to exultation.
Ideals good. :D But I think the best writing is one which, while being aware of its ideal and communicating it to the readers, never really achieves it. That's the best part of people: their dreams and the constant struggle and the constant failure.
♥ hehe
Date: 2004-06-30 11:16 am (UTC)<3
no subject
Date: 2004-06-30 12:12 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-06-30 11:06 pm (UTC)