~~ tell meeeeeee....

[reenka]

So I was going to post another rambling thing on this-and-that, but then I saw this meme and it just had to happen, so. Go nuts. If you want :D

Post anything that you want, and post it anonymously.
A story, a secret, a confession, a fear, a love... anything. Make sure to post anonymously and honestly. Post as many times as you'd like.

I've turned off the option of logging IP addresses, so I have no way of knowing who you are.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

I am constantly afraid that I am going to be trapped in mediocrity for the rest of my life: stuck in a job I hate, in a city I don't particularly care for, surrounded by people who either suffocate or ignore me, all because I'm too scared to try something different. I look back at what I've done versus what I've wished for and I wish I had been more bold. I wish I were brave. But I'm not.

[(Anonymous)]

I want to be just like you. I wish you would read my fiction, and squeal over/trash it, and friend me, and talk to me every day.

[(Anonymous)]

i love your meta, but you contradict yourself sooo much. i know you know it, so its useless to tell you, but sometimes when you go on a righteous rant one day and utterly contradict it the next it gets irritating. also, other peoples opinions can be valid too.

[(Anonymous)]

I no longer believe in love. At least, this is what I tell myself to make myself feel better so I don't have to accept the fact that I am a failure at it.

[(Anonymous)]

you're adorable and I like you a lot, and if you review my work, I am always dreadfully happy about it. sometimes I get lost in your meta, but that's ok by me. I like reading it anyway.

[(Anonymous)]

I love your enthusiasm but you tend to- well, "ramble" is the only word I can think of. You often discuss interesting ideas but your posts are SO LONG and rambling that they're too much effort to wade through. Shorter paragraphs and more concise arguments would be so much easier to read. All the smilies, ~ (*)~~ <<<333, odd capitalization, etc- you seem too intelligent to be a plebe, so I wonder why you fill your posts with this. It almost seems like you're trying to *appear* cute or eccentric, which is just odd- like putting on a fake accent or something. Some of your posts have an air of "proclaiming the truth"- like, you're not just saying "X seems Y" or "I feel like X does Y", but more like "Wake up people, when will you understand that X is Y? It's so obvious". Not that you're rude about it, and of course many many people do the same thing, but it often comes accross as (as another poster said) a "righteous rant". However, as I said you do have some interesting ideas and I have seen some good debates started in your journal. I'm sure you're a nice person.

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

Oh man, I don't know if it's against "etiquette" for this meme to reply, but I just started giggling. Because you said I'm trying to -appear- silly/cute/etc which is... well.... Not true.

I don't know how to say this, but....
I'm just silly and immature, man. I mean, I think about things & yet... I'm not very disciplined and I bounce around and act like a dork most of the time. I don't have the excuse of age or anything (I'm 25 since June), but yeah-- I'm a doofus, pretty much. You can tell if you read my silly-fic, meet me in person or talk to me on AIM or something. I'm just rather ridiculous and over-the-top and goofy. A lot of the time. I have this... rather silly sense of humor.

Actually, this is interesting because addictedkitten, who's seen me a number of times in real life, says in real life I'm nothing like my journal, and she couldn't tell anything about who I was from it. I think I'm just... it's not that this isn't me, it's more that I'm rather... contradictory and um... multifaceted? Is there a word for being many different things in many different situations? Well, I'm that thing.

I honestly find "<3333" and "OMG I'M SO DEAD >:O" to be... cute. A part of me is still 12. A large part of me. Another part of me is this stuck-up 35-year-old philosophy grad student. Yet another part is this insane hippie wacko who can never shut up. And then there's the part that writes stories, which isn't really me and is possibly the most "me" of any of these sides.

But yes-- I really am silly. I sometimes worry that I seem to take myself too seriously on my lj-- that it seems like I don't have a sense of humor. That's kind of scary to me. And I usually use words like "seems" and "I think" and "maybe" too much, and I ramble -because-, partly, I'm unsure and questioning of most things so I -don't- have a position to defend, generally. I'm usually asking myself questions and then stumbling (blindly) upon some answers I then question.

I'm only concise when I know exactly what I'm saying, and I usually don't, you know? I'm like an idiot savant sometimes, I think. I dislike being serious-- I just think about these things and this is what matters to me and I get passionate and carried away and I -do- believe in what I believe (when I know what I believe), and I -do- listen to contradictory/supplementary ideas (even my own!). See, like right now. I'm rambling because I don't know what I think, and yet the idea of my wackiness being an act is just so... wacky. Far from reality. In "reality" I'm just... like Luna, basically. More than a little bit "craaazeeeeeee". Though, I mean, I hate that word and most of the time I think I'm saner than everyone else alive :D

Anyway. Nice? eheheheh. No. Complacent and too empathic for my own good? Most of the time :>

[(Anonymous)]

I am really really tired. Not that that's much of a confession! Um.

Sometimes I feel less kinky or angry than I think I come across in my writing. But likely more fucked up.

[(Anonymous)]

This meme is beginning to annoy me, because everyone is doing it, and there are only so many deep dark secrets a person can have to spill in everyone else's LJs, and also a deep dark secret seems somehow valueless to me if you don't have a person to attach it to. But, I have seen it so many times that I feel obliged to just surrender and write something.

Also, I have little to confess, because my internet pseudonym makes me anonymous anyway, and I'm not established enough to have a 'fandom reputation' that I could damage by letting secrets loose, so the absence of the username does not entice me to confess anything I would not normally. Like, what I wouldn't confess under pseudonym-anonymity I won't confess under this kind of anonymity. See?

I thought the meme was supposed to be about your secrets, not as a way of criticizing the poster, but that's a possibility. But. I don't mind your rambles and I've become used to your style.

Sometimes I wonder if you don't really like me, but I wonder that about many people from time to time. If you actually don't like me, then know that it's always okay to tell me directly - I always like knowing better than letting my paranoid speculations run around. And this is really useless thing to say since you don't know who I am, unless you can figure it out from the style. :D

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

Hee. Duuuude. I only dislike a very few people I know personally (humanity in general is a different matter), and those people are usually ones I don't talk to-- ever. Because I can't stand to. So we're okay. If you're the one who's asked me this before, then I still mean it ~:)
So, if I talk to you on AIM or whatever, then <3333 >:D
If I don't, then <3333 anyway :> hee!

And like, I wonder this sort of thing all the time, so yeah. Paranoia. Oh yeah.
Also, um. I'm just curious about stuff people would want to tell -me-, not just "in general". But hey, whatever floats their boat~:)

[(Anonymous)]

Ah. Thanks. I don't think I've asked you this before, so. :D

[(Anonymous)]

haha, i think you are super cool, even if i didn't friend you until just today. *frets at not being anonymous enough!*

[(Anonymous)]

When I found out that you hadn't read the HP books but were doing meta I was...astounded at how ridiculous that was, and what an insufferable snob you appeared to be, since you didn't seem to care.

I hope I was wrong in my assessment.

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

Oh man.
I dunno if you're going to look back here, but what the heck.
Yeah, if there's anything I'm "infamous" for in the fandom, it's gotta be the that. Um. I -have- read them since, but.

It's like this.
- a) I HATED the bit of `Sorceror's Stone' I'd accidentally read ages ago, when it first came out. Hated. It.
- b) I procrastinate a lot, and I'd rather read slash fics in any fandom-- and most of them, I didn't know the canon for-- than gen young adult fantasy novels. So I put it off. And off. And off.
- c) I did care... but about what? It's hard to care about a canon you hadn't read yet. I cared about the characters, but that doesn't mean I -owe- it to Harry (for instance) to read PoA. It's like... is Harry going to resent me? So, I mean, since it's not schoolwork and what did it matter to anyone but myself (I thought), no, I didn't care much.
- d) I wasn't doing meta the same way a professor gives a lecture, man. I have no credentials. What differentiates me from the lunatic spewing nonsense on the street? Nothing! Only the number of people who choose to listen (and happen to agree). I cannot predict whether or not people want to listen to me or agree. I can only say whatever's on my mind just because I'm babbly like that.
- e) Meta isn't something I take seriously. It's a bit of mental slap and tickle. I pay as much attention to what comes out of my mouth as I do to tying my shoes (if my shoes had laces, I'm wearing sandals recently). Meta, shmeta. Who cares? This isn't a doctoral dissertation, man. Fast and loose and I'm just here for a bit of fun, eh?

As far as whether I'm a snob.....
Eh. I'm semi-elitist and semi-communist and semi-don't-give-a-shit-either-way. Not caring doesn't make me a snob-- there's a lapse in logic there. Pontificating while I know "nothing" so to speak-- that doesn't make me a snob either. That just makes me a poser. Am I a poser? Not really, since I never claimed to have inside knowledge-- I just happened to say in a confident manner, maybe?

I don't care about lots of things-- and conversely, care about lots of things. If you cannot tell what kind of person I am from my writing, I cannot help you. I don't know why I'm defending myself at all, really. Basically-- if you think I'm snobbish or whatever, then you don't know me at all and anything I say about myself you'd have to take on faith, which isn't very useful. There are tons of people who do meta in different fandoms, most of them more coherent than me. I welcome you to look at the entries in metablog in particular.