reenka

almostpretty's `dead leaves and the dirty ground...' is all... pretty and stuff. i used to write like that. or maybe i want to write more like that. i've been all stiff and base and obvious. or ...well... something like that. my fingers don't move like i want them to, but my eyes still see the sky. sigh.

and yeah,

olukemi's tom kinda... kills me. mmmmmmmmrrrr, the sexy has landed.

more purring. adore this drabble by

hoshistar. adore, adore. it has that something, that makes me smile without wincing at all. that's always what i'm looking for in terms of happiness. that smile where it's just -right- and you would've wanted it that way. mmmm.

and guh! how did i miss this? how? how? HOW?? -

somniesperus' `i hate every bone in your body (but mine)'. *purrs* (and yes, i'm disturbed. i mean. yes. the meaner, the sexier-- just the -rhythm- of it, i am seduced. i want draco to be vicious like that, and dominant, and angry and... hyena-like. those ones in `lion king', you know, with the glittering eyes, circling, circling. though i think maybe harry wouldn't go for it. a part of me rebels against harry accepting this draco, see, this draco who -hates- him and not in the "good" way. i think an in-character draco could only barely even hold a -conversation- with an in-character harry, forget get him to submit sexually. hmm. maybe that's the flip-side of me hating dominant-brute!harry. either of them acting totally beta-male doesn't ring true to me. harry has spunk too. harry wouldn't let malfoy get away with this, isn't this why one -ships- h/d? in a way, i think it's weird that i like that ficlet, because i think it's an anti-h/d ficlet, yet it seduced me. hmmm. maybe that's my own malfoy-smitten self speaking. i think the thing is, us fic-writers like draco more than harry would, and we forget that, or something.)

this is the coolest thing. people describing themselves via smell and taste, as well as fictional characters (ie, lotr, buffy, smallville, etc). it's just so inspiring and it makes me burn to -write- for some reason, a hundred times more than if it were visual. mmmmr.

it inspired me to think of a number of things, similarly rich in sensual detail, that one could dwell on in fics, but don't get enough attention. i mean, you could write a whole ficlet based on one single attribute of a person-- a part of their body, something about their physical presence-- sight, smell, taste, touch. it's so pleasant to think about, and especially how it would be -unique- for every person you write about. i think you could really get in touch with your character that way. just by writing about the way you think your-fic!draco (or whoever) walks, talks, breathes, smells, the way his wrist moves, the way his knees look, the way he breathes, the way his eyes change, the way his eyebrows react to his moods, and so on.

so i made a list, as usual, heh.
- hand / fingers / nails / wrist
- eyes / eyelids / eyebrows
- mouth / lips / tongue
- cheeks/ temples
- hair
- neck
- shoulders / collarbones
- hips / thighs / ass
- legs / knees / ankles
- back / shoulders
- chest / nipples
- stomach / navel
- voice
- smile
- laugh
- walk
- handwriting
- scent / taste
~~

(completely unrelatedly), i can't stand

hogwarts_online's draco (well, their harry is a limp noodle as well, but then, you could make the argument that almost all harry's anyone writes in fandom are limp noodles, so whatcha gonna do).

it was bothering me to the point where i was considering writing some sort of angsty ficlet where he proclaims his bitchiness and love for harry. like, a lot. which is sort of against my religion (ever since my initial hp fics were all angst all the time, i've decided it's best to avoid that whole, "woe is me, i love/hate/need/crave/obsess over harry"!draco thing). but it just drives home one thing. i can deal with angsty!draco. i can deal with fluffy!draco. what i -can't- deal with is reasonable, polite, nice, concerned!draco. it makes me sick. really sick. i want to hit him, kill him, and give him a boatload of angst. angst, draco, angst, goddamn you! or at least be snarky! if you are not snarky, you deserve to DIE! i hate you, reasonable!draco. hatehatehatehate you. the way to torture me is to write reasonable, kind-hearted, polite draco fic. he needs to die. he really needs to die. penelope clearwater??!! not -only- do you need to die, you need to die twice, you goddamn traitor. i am so, so tempted to write deathfic angst slash right now. where draco realizes what a stupid fucking excuse for a malfoy he's become, and offs himself after killing harry and hermione, or something. something. i like fluff, okay. but this? this is a travesty of everything pure and good in the world.

draco malfoy isn't NICE, goddamnit. i hate him if he's nice about a zillion times more than if he's an evil, stuck-up git. at least then he's got character.... but at least this reassures me that it's not that he's not with -harry- that's like a bone caught in my throat. it's the niceness. a nice!draco -with- harry would be even -more- unbearable, if possible. so maybe him being away is a Good Thing. see, it's so perfect: if draco is an impossible, arrogant bastard, then no one else -wants- him but harry. and not even harry (well, at first). but if you make him some sort of attractive, nice, well-to-do bachelor, then even some stupid girl like penelope clearwater can get him. and that's just not draco anymore. go write about... about... (*thinks*)... who's nice, who's nice... neville!! go write about neville and penelope clearwater! neville lost weight! he's so haaaaandsome. he's so chaaaaaaarming. he's fucking drop-dead-gorgeous now, so why doesn't everyone who wants nice!draco run along and write -that-??!

see, if you write your own (original) fic... you create your own characters... you don't just pair them up randomly, do you? you -know- what you want for these characters, and you do what's -right- for them, right? you don't just mix-and-match, do you? you have a story to tell, and you tell it. you see what fits the best, you see what works, and you extrapolate. you don't just see many serious published works (of anything resembling quality) where it seems like characters were merely thrown together for the author's fleeting perverse amusement. and yet, since it's fanfiction, why take it seriously? we're "having fun", so it doesn't matter what the character's doing and who with and what the larger point you're making is. yes, larger point, goddamnit.

and granted, this is just practice, "just fanfic", and so on (and yes, i'm treating rp-based storytelling as fanfic, or rather, storytelling for my purposes). but it's all story, all a reflection of you as a writer, and your attitude towards your own writing.

...i am almost certain i'm becoming entirely too cranky. yah. i just need a good laugh (at them, ahahahah). ahhh, found this post by telanu and although she's only skewering ooc!harry rather than ooc!draco, all is good again. oh, brilliance. brilliance. ehehehe! oh, what fun it is to sit and point instead of get -offended- at these things. it's not -sad-, it's -funny-! hilarious! how could i have forgotten? *joins the Draco Malfoy Defamation League forthwith*

harry could look out for himself, no? -.-