![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
reenkai didn't really understand the whole "politics on lj" idea until well-- it occurred to me that politics can also mean the need/desire to change what you say in order to keep up a certain appearance, whether personal or in relationship to someone or something else.
i'm not the sort, i've always thought, that cares what anyone thinks-- although that's mostly not been tested. people kind of ignore me, and well-- i try to ignore them back, unless they're really loud and obnoxious and then i try to get away. but i've always been opinionated, and it always seemed disgusting the way i saw people change their opinions because their friends "introduced" them to a new and better way to think. i mean, that's what those sheep in high school acted like, going around looking like clones of each other.
i wasn't a clone, and i was damn proud of it. damn them all, anyway, as far as i was concerned. of course, it's easy to damn people you don't know, generally.
anyway, it's an interesting phenomenon. i find myself feeling a little weird if i don't agree with people i like. not so much that i'd pretend i -do- agree, but i can see how people could iwind up not saying anything, and avoiding the issue altogether. a part of us must be worried that if you disagree, something is wrong with either you or them, and sooner or later "they" are going to find out, and things will be exposed as fraudulent. or something.
of course, people disagreeing (even violently) is supposed to be actually an -incentive- for a relationship of some sort, although usually you get sexual tension type stories written about it. certainly, i've gone even further and enjoyed/written stories about people who -hate- one another, so you'd think disagreement would be at the root of it. and it's not like anyone thinks if they're in love they automatically suddenly agree on the things they used to disagree on. maybe they're having too much sex to really think about their ideals though.
it's a weird feeling, certainly, falling in love with (or even -liking-) someone whose thoughts are (at times violently) at odds with yours. say, i fell in love with someone who's a catholic misanthropic videogame-obsessed (i'm like, the opposite of a game-lover) fanfic-hating snob. it would seem nearly unimaginable. but, it happens ><;;
what was my point? oh yes. i actually probably seem more tame-natured than i am, which bothers me.
it seems if you say you -hate- or -can't stand- or generally find something (idea-wise, or worse, practice-wise) in a public community like lj, it would just get jumped. at worst, it would start a flame-war. at best, it would get people to say things that make you feel silly and wrong, unless you're really sure of yourself. this isn't to say it's really happened to me or that i've said anything anyone has as of yet really found objectionable, but i -could-. i -could- say it, but i don't. that's what bothers me.
i mean, i -do- just feel things that aren't necessarily defensible. and i do spend a lot of time rationalizing them and making them seem all intellectual just because i use vaguely intelligent language to say them. i mean... the whole hp fanfic thing isn't the most intellectually defensible of obsessions. most obsessions are kind of silly, in one way of looking at it. i could be obsessed with collecting coca-cola bottle caps, or toy trains, and that would also be stupid, so i don't feel too bad. but in the end, i like the things i like, and dislike a lot of others. though i suppose i don't stand to gain anything ranting on about them either way. hmm. also, as soon as i start typing, i become more reasonable than if you were to just listen to me in person, in which case i would just say, "wah, those people -suck-, man. they're all insane. ahahahah. THEY'RE ALL INSANE!!#!&*!!" hee~:)
EDIT: ok, i'll just say it, damnit all. i hate boybands. i hate them, HATE them, can't stand them, i'm against everything they're made to represent, everything they stand for as idols for teenage girls to worship as if they have no brains or musical taste (yes, all we want to hear is sappy stupid recycled love ballads, yes), them and their fat-pocketed pushers with no scruples or real passion for music, and mtv and the stupid adulation they get for being "hot" and "cute" and "sexy" (from the majority of their fans) while actual brilliant musicians never get released.
"ewww, boybands & bubblegum pop/rap/soul [and don't get me started on most rap] & stupid mass-media pushers & blond sex-symbols in baggy pants and stupid sunglasses and gold chains and fast cars and too-shiny smiles & baggy pants in particular & empty lyrics & blind teeny-bopper fangirls & fake breasts on said plastic fangirls just like their plastic pop-diva heroes & evil music corporate machine, i hate it, fuck it, fuck it & nsync in particular but not especially, as long as i don't have to hear them, live and let live & i hate sugary insipid lyrics and fake synthesizer pop & crooning people in suits & damn them all, damn them all to hell!"
ok, i feel better now ><;;
oh, and yum!![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
angryillusions made me go to my happy place with this wonderfully shaded, yummy draco sketch. mmm.
i'm not the sort, i've always thought, that cares what anyone thinks-- although that's mostly not been tested. people kind of ignore me, and well-- i try to ignore them back, unless they're really loud and obnoxious and then i try to get away. but i've always been opinionated, and it always seemed disgusting the way i saw people change their opinions because their friends "introduced" them to a new and better way to think. i mean, that's what those sheep in high school acted like, going around looking like clones of each other.
i wasn't a clone, and i was damn proud of it. damn them all, anyway, as far as i was concerned. of course, it's easy to damn people you don't know, generally.
anyway, it's an interesting phenomenon. i find myself feeling a little weird if i don't agree with people i like. not so much that i'd pretend i -do- agree, but i can see how people could iwind up not saying anything, and avoiding the issue altogether. a part of us must be worried that if you disagree, something is wrong with either you or them, and sooner or later "they" are going to find out, and things will be exposed as fraudulent. or something.
of course, people disagreeing (even violently) is supposed to be actually an -incentive- for a relationship of some sort, although usually you get sexual tension type stories written about it. certainly, i've gone even further and enjoyed/written stories about people who -hate- one another, so you'd think disagreement would be at the root of it. and it's not like anyone thinks if they're in love they automatically suddenly agree on the things they used to disagree on. maybe they're having too much sex to really think about their ideals though.
it's a weird feeling, certainly, falling in love with (or even -liking-) someone whose thoughts are (at times violently) at odds with yours. say, i fell in love with someone who's a catholic misanthropic videogame-obsessed (i'm like, the opposite of a game-lover) fanfic-hating snob. it would seem nearly unimaginable. but, it happens ><;;
what was my point? oh yes. i actually probably seem more tame-natured than i am, which bothers me.
it seems if you say you -hate- or -can't stand- or generally find something (idea-wise, or worse, practice-wise) in a public community like lj, it would just get jumped. at worst, it would start a flame-war. at best, it would get people to say things that make you feel silly and wrong, unless you're really sure of yourself. this isn't to say it's really happened to me or that i've said anything anyone has as of yet really found objectionable, but i -could-. i -could- say it, but i don't. that's what bothers me.
i mean, i -do- just feel things that aren't necessarily defensible. and i do spend a lot of time rationalizing them and making them seem all intellectual just because i use vaguely intelligent language to say them. i mean... the whole hp fanfic thing isn't the most intellectually defensible of obsessions. most obsessions are kind of silly, in one way of looking at it. i could be obsessed with collecting coca-cola bottle caps, or toy trains, and that would also be stupid, so i don't feel too bad. but in the end, i like the things i like, and dislike a lot of others. though i suppose i don't stand to gain anything ranting on about them either way. hmm. also, as soon as i start typing, i become more reasonable than if you were to just listen to me in person, in which case i would just say, "wah, those people -suck-, man. they're all insane. ahahahah. THEY'RE ALL INSANE!!#!&*!!" hee~:)
EDIT: ok, i'll just say it, damnit all. i hate boybands. i hate them, HATE them, can't stand them, i'm against everything they're made to represent, everything they stand for as idols for teenage girls to worship as if they have no brains or musical taste (yes, all we want to hear is sappy stupid recycled love ballads, yes), them and their fat-pocketed pushers with no scruples or real passion for music, and mtv and the stupid adulation they get for being "hot" and "cute" and "sexy" (from the majority of their fans) while actual brilliant musicians never get released.
"ewww, boybands & bubblegum pop/rap/soul [and don't get me started on most rap] & stupid mass-media pushers & blond sex-symbols in baggy pants and stupid sunglasses and gold chains and fast cars and too-shiny smiles & baggy pants in particular & empty lyrics & blind teeny-bopper fangirls & fake breasts on said plastic fangirls just like their plastic pop-diva heroes & evil music corporate machine, i hate it, fuck it, fuck it & nsync in particular but not especially, as long as i don't have to hear them, live and let live & i hate sugary insipid lyrics and fake synthesizer pop & crooning people in suits & damn them all, damn them all to hell!"
ok, i feel better now ><;;
oh, and yum!
angryillusions made me go to my happy place with this wonderfully shaded, yummy draco sketch. mmm.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2003-01-12 02:29 am (UTC)oh, man. SO many of my fandom friends gave me tons of shit when I started HP slash. I pretty much made an open offer for people to delete me off their friends list. (Not a very well-looked-on interest in the greater fandom.) From getting all kinds of rude and nasty shit from people about boyband slash, right into abuse about harry potter slash. *sighs* *plays the tiniest violin in the WORLD for her pain* heh.
Fandom bashing can hurt, though. Yeah. I agree with you that, oddly enough, disliking video games or not is something to affectionately tolerate, but fandom can be upsetting. I'm such a multi-fandom whore that I kind of have had to get used to it, because no one is going to share all of my loves... but that doesn't always make it easier. Feels so invasive and bruised pride when someone gets particularly virolic. Just have to repeat a thousand times to myself that it's not personal and it's not actually me they're bashing and take a few very deep breaths. ;)
no subject
Date: 2003-01-12 02:36 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-01-12 02:39 am (UTC)or someone's pyjamas. damn, i know it had pyjamas in there somewhere....
but yes. i'm usually pretty devoted to everything i'm into past a certain point. i used to read/watch/listen to some embarrassing things i'd rather not defend. like say, "saved by the bell" eheheheh
on the other hand, i get the hp-bashing people. i mean, i used to be one of them. it -is- not my type of thing, usually, since i'm something of a fantasy-lit connoisseur. i -still- don't like her writing. but i like ivy's and aja's and so on, so what the hell~:)
plus now i've gone and gotten all affectionate towards harry. to the point of petting his stuff doll, which is the point -most- people would raise eyebrows at.
but really, all obsessions are silly, which is how i excuse them all~:)
unless you're into stuffed dolls of george w. bush. in which case you are -wrong-, twisted and wrong ~:)