~~darcy!draco, recs, wibbling.

[reenka]

i have a new theory. i always have a new theory, i sort of produce one or two per day as part of a regular cycle, but. anyway.



reading the darcy/draco comparison by heidi8 made me realize (finally) the nature of my discomfort with draco/hermione. i mean, naturally i have discomfort with anything that isn't what seems most `natural' and perfect to me, but it's not just that. i think if it's -really- wrong, i just laugh. with this, i am more confused.
    the thing is, it's the kind of draco that would go with hermione, not being mine. his redemption comes easier to him. it's just a matter of opening up, of letting love in, of making a choice. comparatively, it's simple. he doesn't have a whole lot of demons, really-- just some hang-ups. he is soft-spoken and yet biting, but really, he is more charmingly misguided than evil and pathetic.

there's this paradigm. changing for the love of a woman. fighting it, and hating it, but ultimately realizing that you're a `better man' through knowing her. you can allow yourself surrender because she makes you more of who you wanted to be.
    this is archetypical, and ingrained in our natures to respond favorably to, if we like romance, anyway. spike & buffy, darcy & elizabeth, higgins & eliza, it's all variations on a theme.

in my mind, spike & buffy aren't so clear-cut, more on the border, but really, they can still fit in with the others. the dfference, with harry & draco, is that they have this conflict coming at them from both sides. i don't think any surrender is really all that positive for them. it's not just a question of darcy-- ie, draco. it's a question of harry, too. harry has to change, in order for this connection to really work. it's a two-way deal.
    harry & draco's struggle can't really be -resolved-, and their romance kept alive. there's no -ending-, no `happily ever after', no `and now our lives can' begin', because then the initial draw, the conflict, would be gone.
    there's also the question of slash!draco being able to continue existing with no retraction of claws necessary. i can't help imagining draco/hermione!draco as being a lite version of himself. not so many issues. not so much pain. not so much violence. not so much denial. not so much meanness, and so on. this draco can behave, to some vital degree.

i wonder if this is hypocritical. some of my favorite versions of draco haven't been -too- mean and pathetic and violent. or at all. say, all the crushing fics i adore, and UL!draco and Trilogy!draco, as far as i can see. really, charm. any time he's got a lot of charm. i love it. i suppose this sort of draco can go with hermione, almost better than harry.
    harry has charm too, of course. but i see him as somewhat naturally reserved, in a different way than hermione. word-play obfuscates things, makes them less visceral, less likely to topple defenses.
    my other favorite draco's-- IP, artful facade, origins, for example-- wouldn't really go well with hermione at all. love alone won't break them. maybe nothing would break them. they're just extremely tightly fitted to harry. it's all about harry, but that doesn't mean they just melt. they're still perfectly capable of doing exactly the wrong thing. love may change them-- but it's a close call. they hold on to themselves pretty tightly. they like who they are, it's all they have, and they don't know how to be anyone else anyway.

~~
quick recs:
    quire's after hours & its sort-of-sequel, exhale. wah. `paths' was definitely one of the most promising beginnings that never blossomed ever, in this fandom full of unopened buds, only rivalled by slightlights' mirrors. sigh. anyway, she wrote two h/d ficlets~! all edgy and tense and minimalist and somehow, really intimately emotional. and short enough so that i don't even notice myself reading them, until i'm done. this is how i've been reading things lately-- i've so much backlog, i feel too guilty to pick one thing over another, so i wind up reading very little.
    of course, hopefully that's what thanksgiving break is for. i will catch up with -everything-. i will. *coughs* no. really.
    *fighting impulse to hide, unable to face knowing i have been so lax - making laxness worse of course*

& marysiak's the world according to draco malfoy is probably the most balanced & realistic young, canon draco i've read. so smoothly integrating characterization and canon elements, it all seems to fit together and create some new whole. am even more chagrined at jkr's lack of characterization prowess.
    EDIT: dark_soul_lost makes me happy, ehehehe. ahhhh, glowy shiny semi-smut~! there's nothing like it :D
~~
P.S. -- Happy B-day, Zahra~!
    i guess i'll use this as an excuse to rec the `contract' series, again. because it has woobie!in-denial!draco, and that's just more fun than a barrel of monkeys. or, nearly. also, i drew fanart for it, which just makes it that much more of a must-read, i'm sure. heh.

Comments

[ex-dark-soul916.livejournal.com]

::blushes and dies::

i love you.

and i love the tilt of draco's mouth in the pic, it's just so... resigned, you know?