[ba-da-bummm!]

[reenka]

You Know You're a Harry Slut (And You Might Need Help) When:


- 1. Get your facts straight: it's Gryffindor Sex God, not Slytherin. Honestly! Harry wins why? Because he deserves to win!!
- 2. Sometimes it still shocks you that there are actually people who like the books in spite of instead of because of Harry. You mean the books are about something other than Harry??!
- 3. Harry fanart makes you squee the most, no matter what he's doing or who he's with. (Wheee, Harry with Hagrid! Harry's hair looks particularly cute in that one!)
- 4. You have or want to have every Harry doll, plushie or action figure ever made. You cuddle (or talk) with one or more at a time. If someone touches the plushie, they DIE!!1 (...but the plushie can cuddle a Draco figure if one's around.)
- 5. Sometimes you think you like Ron or Hermione just 'cause they're Harry's friends. Do they have great taste or what?? Hagrid is also kind of okay (hey, Harry likes him, that's good enough for you!)
- 6. You think Harry definitely deserves to get whatever girl he likes (and that other girl, sure why not...), the boy (and that other boy looks tasty too), and hey, why not also the welcome-wagon and a butterbeer or two? THE BOY NEEDS A REST. SNAP TO IT, EVERYBODY.
- 7. You have to remember to catch yourself to stop thinking of everyone in canon from Harry's pov and over-justifying things.
- 8. Your heart flutters everytime you see that sexy-heroic-glare image of him from the PoA promotional poster, passing by in Blockbuster. Forget about the sword shot from CoS, 'cause even thinking of that makes you twitch in um, glee.
- 9. Your feelings are hurt anytime someone says Harry is something less than adorable in spite and because of all his flaws or doesn't seem to understand HIS DEEP AND MEANINGFUL ANGST. WHY IS THE WORLD SO MEAN??!

and

- 10. You look at the scarily green American HP:HBP cover and think, OMG HARRY! I'VE MISSED YOU SO! YOU LOOK SMASHING, AND HEY, A LITTLE BIT OLDER! AWWWW YOU'RE GROWING UP!! BABY!! I CANNOT WAIT TILL I'M CLUTCHING YOU FEVERISHLY IN MY HAPPY LITTLE PAWS! AAAH! WHY MUST YOUR DORKY GLASSES ENTHRALL ME SO??!

.... And then you see the British cover and think, WAH NO HARRY! NOOOooooo -.-

Comments

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

Hee, that was prolly the most sincere bit ^^;;; I argue too, though usually give up when the person admits it's just a personal preference or whatever, and they just don't like 'guys like that' or something. Though I still pout and feel alone in the world :))

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

I guess I must be channeling Harry again :"> :))

[notrafficlights.livejournal.com]

Speaking of Harry-poo, I'm definitely digging the British cover over the Yank one. But I'm biased, because we get the UK Bloomsbury versions here in Upside-Down land. Oh, yeah, and Dumbledore looks like he's about to pop a cap in someone's ass. Bigtime.

But y'know, frankly I don't care, as long I get my Draco's Detour fix. :P

Seriously though, sometimes I want to slap him. Not quite as much as Albert from Gankutsu-O (OMG most annoying protagonist EVER!!11one Which of course, just makes me love the evil Count more), but yeah. The urge happens. Cos he's rather thick sometimes. And stubborn. And both at the same time causes my eye to twitch. Obviously I don't get the deep and meaningful CAPSLOCKED angst, or at least, I don't get why he hasn't turned goth/emo/Slytherin/evil-as-fuck because of it now. Which is disappointing, because I'm hanging out for some darkside!Harry in canon.

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

Heeeeeeeee *dedz*
...Actually, I think the British cover is cooler too, on a design level. BUT WHO CARES ABOUT DESIGN??!? ahahaha. *cough*
I want to slap Draco all the time-- I think I am starting to see some sort of pattern, 'cause Draco-lovin' H/D shippers always want to slap Harry. They're both pretty slappable (...is that a word?? okay, no) I mean, Draco is stubborn, whiny & makes really stupid jokes and generall does his best to act like a jackass. Is that not a slappable offense, I ask you??!

The reason he hasn't turned evilly goth is 'cause HE'S SO RIGHTEOUS OMG. Actually, it's 'cause he doesn't really -want- anything; like, he doesn't want power over people or to control people or to take over any organization (not even the DA)-- he just wants the people who annoy him to go away and shut up. The real Slytherin-type behavior starts when you achieve what Machiavellians like to call "the will to Power"-- which Voldie has, which Draco has, which even Hermione has-- but Harry doesn't. He has power without the will to wield it, so much. He lashes out at people (like Draco, for instance) without premeditation-- he just acts on how he feels but he doesn't pre-plan these things, he doesn't really intend to go anywhere with his anger 'cause I think he's your regular semi-antisocial teenage boy. He doesn't have a 'goal', basically.

He -has- turned emo, though :D

[notrafficlights.livejournal.com]

Is that not a slappable offense, I ask you??!

Of course it is, but it's a quantity thing see. In the books, we get more slappable-action from Harry, cos it's from his POV. If it was from Draco's, I'm sure I'd want to slap him just as much.

He has power without the will to wield it, so much.

Pussy!

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

I think I just identify with whoever the pov character is... which is why I'd gotten close to Draco soon after getting into HP fic, 'cause most fics were from Draco's pov. It's weird to me to imagine dissociating myself from the story long enough to be annoyed at the pov narrator-- it's like the stream of consciousness has to be accepted in order for the story to be enjoyable for me. I couldn't enjoy the books if I was easily annoyed at the pov character, y'know? Otherwise I'd be constantly annoyed and not read it >.<;; So I wind up just empathizing and taking his side all the time without even questioning it. I don't think I have a very concrete 'self' when I read, I guess?

Hehe if Harry's a pussy, what does that make Draco?
SUPER PUSSY??!

[notrafficlights.livejournal.com]

Hehe if Harry's a pussy, what does that make Draco?

Fanon's (http://www.livejournal.com/users/adora_spintriae/48428.html) Pussy's bitch.

I think I just identify with whoever the pov character is

You are so easy. *takes advantage*

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

EHEHEHE HE IS SO KEEWT <3<3<3 WITH THE POINTY CHIN AND THE TAIL AND THE HUMPING *is slowly brainwashed* He's all smiling beautifically at his subjects, aww <3<3 And the little quirked eyebrow <3

...NOT THAT I LIKE HIM OR ANYTHING.

I'm easy except for my super-duper chastity-belt of Doom, extreme mind-reading powers and sonic eye-rays of Destiny that will pierce through all deception and NULLIFY ALL SLYTHERIN THREATS WITH THE BLINK OF AN EYE.

...or something.

[notrafficlights.livejournal.com]

Ahh, so you're not-easy in the same way fanon!Harry is not-easy?

Dude, I don't even notice the eyebrows on Draco anymore when I draw him until someone points them out to me,. I just automatically do that without thinking. *creeps out*

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

...it is true that Draco's eyebrows are always waggling or quirking or wobbling or doing something vaguely lewd and possibly uncalled for in public areas. *nodnod*

AHHH DON'T ENCOURAGE MY PROJECTION ISSUES >:O >:O
*repeats to self* I AM NOTHING LIKE HARRY. NOTHING, I TELL YOU, NOTHING!

[firstblush.livejournal.com]

Isn't it always personal preference in regards to things you like? I think that people can state why they like something and the other can state why they don't, but I always felt it had less to do with persuading another person to change their minds (which in regards to "like" rarely will happen!) than opening the other person up to where you're coming from.

duh duh duh. Just my opinion.

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

Well, yes ^^; I did say I was sincere but I didn't say I was serious :> That is to say, I rationally understand the truth while still emotionally seeing a different truth, if that makes sense? Anyway, I never actually try to get anyone to change their minds-- it's just that I'm not always reasonable or serious enough to um, mention that disclaimer ^^

[marksykins.livejournal.com]

*cries because nearly all of these apply to her*

Though luckily not 4 and 5. My Harry and Draco LEGOs are all I have, and I won those. I like Ron and Hermione for weird reasons, and don't much like Hagrid at all. And 3 is only true, like, 90% of the time. That's okay, right?!

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

HEHEHE Luckily, I don't fit 4 & 5 either. Though I do have a rather... close and personal relationship with my plushie :> :> Mostly this was me making fun of myself. IT WORKED, DIDN'T IT >:D

...I also have this creeping feeling everyone who doesn't identify with at least some of that though my list was REALLY NOT FUNNY AT ALL :)) :)) :))

[shaggirl.livejournal.com]

AWWWW YOU'RE GROWING UP!! BABY!! I CANNOT WAIT TILL I'M CLUTCHING YOU FEVERISHLY IN MY HAPPY LITTLE PAWS! AAAH!

You are such a pervert. It's why I love you. ;)

[malafede.livejournal.com]

[slinkhard.livejournal.com]

*writes list of 'You Know You're a Malafede Slut When...'*

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

SELF-LOVE IS THE FIRST STEP TO RECOVERY >:O >:O >:O

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

...and here I was trying to evoke fuzzy forest-animal imagery just so I seemed more harmless & asexual!!1

AND YOU SEE RIGHT THROUGH ME!! NUTS!! >:O
teehee

[shaggirl.livejournal.com]

See I thought you were just shamelessly displaying your furry kink.

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

...well, yeah, Harry's tail does have its perks. I mean merits. I mean... I like fluffy. *coughs*

[notrafficlights.livejournal.com]

Oh. I have something for you that was recently sent to me, and I figure I should pass it on since you're always pimping me manga...

Chintsubu (http://s23.yousendit.com/d.aspx?id=22GARPGKG86H622K4ENTUSKIGL), Featuring a talking penis with glasses. You will love it.

[literaryll.livejournal.com]

LOL just had to say that this list is awesome and that I agree with all of them but especially #8 :D

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

It's always great to know I'm not alone with my issues :D :D :D!
...And man, I'm such a sucker for Daniel's Glare Of Doom (heheheheh TOM SO DOESN'T HAVE ONE. AT ALL. EHEHEHE IS IT SO OBVIOUS WHO'S THE PUSSY AROUND HERE. ahem.)

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

Eheheehh! *bounces*
*is intrigued!*
...I will now send you one where there's groundhog!penis & cobra!penis. BECAUSE I CARE<3<3<3

*snorts* I wonder why tf doesn't have it

[malafede.livejournal.com]

You Know You're a Harry Slut (And You Might Need Help) When:

#11: You actually start to think Daniel Radcliffe can act at all.

(Don't be angry, I'm just trying to be cute.)

[malafede.livejournal.com]

HARRY IS SO OPPRESSED.

[literaryll.livejournal.com]

Daniel's Glare Of Doom - lol that's great - yes it is nice to know that one isn't alone - god this one time I was driving to school and blockbuster had this big poster in the window for POA and I was staring at it so much that I was starting to swerve and the person behind me had to honk LOL - really very sad - Tom can so not compete with it :D

Re: *snorts* I wonder why tf doesn't have it

[slinkhard.livejournal.com]

*adds to own list*

Re: *snorts* I wonder why tf doesn't have it

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

Ahahaha yeah I know -.- -.-

On the bright side, I rather prefer that Bleeding Romantics fic by far over the dribble you linked me to.
...You thought you'd like it 'cause of the first line, didn't you. *smirks*