[because I actually used to do a lot of this, you know]

There's this weird feeling I get skimming through these short little fics by ___visions, especially Same, but also this poem-like thing. It's like, it's not -good- or polished or particularly concerned with canon, but... what I really like is that it gives me The Feeling. Like hearing a tune you know and love, even if it's sung off-key and a sounds a little hokey with that harmonica or whatever. It's like it's got its heart in the right place, or something.

I particularly like the beginning, which reads a lot like one of the myriad angsty intellislashy H/D fics I imprinted on back in '02. I used to write about Draco's "moon-white complexion", man. I know it's kinda lame, but I'm still nostalgic about it; tragic-yet-spiteful skinny-as-a-reed Draco with his sharp cheekbones and sharper words. Heh. Okay, so then the ficlet goes completely off-course, but I like the beginning, pleasantly pre-OoTP as it is.

The whole aesthetic's mostly different now, y'know. People (writers) seem to have completely accepted Draco as someone who needs compassion; he's not much of a badboy or controversial figure in the fandom anymore, even if he is to -Harry- (at least, moreso). And I know it's just plain wrong to say Harry hated him more than the Dursleys 'at first sight', but that's exactly the sort of thing I miss; the sort of Harry who's plagued by Draco, who's insecure and resentful rather than, y'know, 'a perfect boyfriend'. This is hilarious, in a way, since HBP was pretty much a ripe breeding ground for angst; Harry was plagued by Draco-- his ghost, almost, seeing as how he was mostly in absentia (though of course most people took it sexually). You know... like, I think I just... am an angst-hound in H/D, more than I usually am with other pairings. They just... do it so well :>
    Ahahaha, I just got feedback on a really old fluff-fic from '02 ('My Favourite Things') saying my Draco was the 'perfect boyfriend' (!!!!!!!!) and yet IC somehow (!!!!!) so now I have angst :)) I was actually thinking of reading helenish's Ron/Draco fics 'cause I absolutely adore her Sentinel stuff, but... nooooooo. I'm still chained. :>

...I kind of miss [my old] fandom. :/ I love bitter/angry lovesongs for H/D ♥

[...well, there's also The People's Right to Suck, I guess.]

You know, I just noticed that I use the word 'porn' quite a lot on this lj. Um. I dunno how I should feel about that, but. I'm pretty positive-minded about porn, really. I'm even tempted to say 'any porn is good porn', but I don't actually believe it; for instance, some porn is Really Bad (quality), and that does bother me. I don't mean it's unhot or whatever (since that's all kink/preference); I mean it's just lame & tacky. Not that 'tacky' is a scientific term (though maybe it should be! the world would be a better place!!), but I Know It When I See it. It's like... I'm not even talking about writing, per se, 'cause you get this effect with visual stuff also. A bit like twinkies... oversaturated with cream and yet not exactly tiramisu-- well, the complete opposite of a tiramisu. Like, if 'tiramisu'!porn was a superhero, twinkie!porn would be its pathetically cackling, plans-revealing, yellow-spandex-wearing arch-nemesis. I'm just saying. :/ I don't mean softcore vs hardcore or artsy vs raw-- it's just... you can be hardcore and visceral and dirty and not... tacky. I think. I know it's lame to have a whole aesthetic of porn, but I really can't help myself, so. ^^;

Anyway! I started down this path 'cause I got a review on aff.net on my PG13/R-ish non-explicit old Ron/Ginny fic (from a guy!!) saying that my Ron was unrealistic because he didn't just jump to uh, 'lay [his] cock on her sex ready pussy' and didn't have enough 'balls' to just kind of go 'YEAY, INCESTUOUS SEX TIME!' ahahahahahahahfalkjslkaj;klfjsd;lkjgdlfkjggs That's pretty classic, I think. But that's what I mean by 'tacky' :P Uh. I don't mind the comment, it's really the bit with the 'sex ready pussy' that gets to me ^^;

I was also thinking about people's hang-ups ('cause, uh, was that a hang-up??), reading this post in comicsworthreading.com about an article in Wizard magazine where they did a poll/quiz on various artists' chick's butts in comics. And people were all offended 'cause WOE! Women's butts objectified in comics??? O RLY??! That sort of thing. I think it's pretty hilarious 'cause... hi, whole history of American comics, have we met? Also, uhh, what's wrong with being a little gratuitously pervy? There's even a word for this in Japanese-- sort of harmless perviness, differentiating 'bad/hardcore/twisted perv' [hentai] and 'good/mild kinky perv' [ecchi] (...hopefully, this makes my intermittent porn references cutely 'ecchi', haha). Those butts were just... mildly ecchi. I mean... repressed much? Man. -.-

...a part of me suspects that people get up in arms because in the US we like to think we keep our pr0n & our 'normal' stuff totally segregated, without the ambiguous 'bridge' ecchi-type material; like, porn might be good, but OVER THERE IN THAT CORNER. This is obviously complete bollocks, taking a look at our actual pop-culture, the TV & movies and so on, but... I think US media is like... provocative without really enjoying its own ecchi flavor. It's like the ecchiness is there to get people to buy stuff or watch the show rather than for the Joy of Perv. Or whatever.

So I was also thinking of how there was a spate of posts righteously defending 'the People's Right to Pr0n' recently, and it occurred to me that the more you justify & rationalize smuttiness/perversion, the less fun it becomes-- because isn't the attraction that of The Forbidden most of the time anyway? Like... I think a lot of the kinks -I- have in fic developed because they started off breaking some taboo & I felt like they 'should' be Just Plain Wrong, except I liked that. So going on and on about how it's actually perfectly fine & reasonable to be kinky seems to be missing the point; isn't at least half the initial appeal of incest & exhibitionism and even your average 'vanilla' boy/boy slash because it's just... shocking? Deliciously abnormal? Something like that, anyway; at least enough so that it seems ridiculous to either attack smut with the 'but It's So Wrong' line or defend it purely on that basis.

(Whatever you think is) filthy-dirty-wrong = HOT!

I'm not discovering America here, I know, but it's amazing how people just... forget that :>