~~ the monstrous mundane

Hands down, my least favorite moral dilemma in the universe is: do you do the kind, comfortable, reasonable thing or do you do the mad, passionate, unlikely-to-succeed thing. The problem is, everywhere I see this dilemma raised (in fiction anyway), people choose column A. This leads me to sputter and growl and go on about hating people.

Clearly, I always choose column B. My life kind of isn't the best for it, but it's worth it just to know that at least I'm not shoving my passion into a box and labeling it "done". But even as much as I hate seeing this dilemma applied to life in general, when applied to romance, it just maddens me. Infuriates and saddens and depresses. I mean, it makes sense-- picking partners 'cause they're safe and comfortable, on a purely evolutionary level. Mad monkey sex is all well and good, but eventually it grows dull and you want some good old cuddling on the TV couch, right? (Picture me strangling invisible things -here-).

Reading `(Do I Dare) Disturb the Universe' (definitely rec-worthy, but it did a number on me), this sort of hit me full force, because it kind of equates the William part of Spike to the sensible-thing and the Spike part to the mad-thing. There is still love binding it all, but it's different aspects of love, and all this is linked to growth-- the process of growing up, realizing that you can't live the life you used to live. That would be another thing that drives me insane, that idea. I realize life has stages, but the idea that insane adventures are confined to one's wild youth-- that chafes, man. That chafes something fierce. (More strangling ensues.)

And then tying this all to soulhood? Now that -really- messes with my mind.

( ...All in all, I think the following qualifies as soul-wank. )

~~

I think I've run out of steam. I just love the easy-illustration quality of this whole messy soul business. In HP, for instance, it's nowhere near this clear (in all its fuzziness), so people consistently go and call Draco "an evil brat" without any real mental work done. It's interesting, because in HP, the truly "evil" don't really have a chance for redemption in canon as far as I can see, because there's no nifty "soul" trick to fix anything. The idea of soul is entirely different, as seen through the Dementors. They give you the Dementor's Kiss-- and you basically die. Thus, one can't retain personality or life or -anything- beyond possibly a heartbeat, without a soul. So one assumes Voldemort has one-- it's what's keeping him alive, really, isn't it? As twisted as it is-- it's still -his-, isn't it. Then again, as "undead" as Voldemort is, his body is really always at risk moreso than his consciousness. In Buffy, it's the opposite, isn't it? You can easily be undead based on body alone. So it's a whole different world-view.

( Can't resist a lil bit of compare-and-contrast, can I? )

Also: I have now watched exactly one (1) season one (1) episode (the third one) and I'm now ridiculously in love with Xander. Whoa, man. What -happened- to him?? This is so sad. And-- today! I woke up in full possession of my faculties, and my obsession slightly more manageable. Yeay for team Reena.