wah. at the very end of reading `his dark materials', and i'm rather tired. tiiiiired. and it's funny because the more tired i get from the continuous reading, so that sparkles aren't shooting out of my eyes all the time, the more i read cautiously, not entirely so, but enough to notice the dents. there aren't enough to disturb me, of course, but there's almost enough to give me pause. mostly it's a sort of rueful amusement because sometimes i can just tell when the author's being more transparent and hurrying things along and things click into place because they -have- to. there's very much a sense of control about this sort of storytelling, and you just have to ride it, look past the mechanics and through to the spirit of the greater story.
i'm not used to things being so intricately plotted-- or maybe i've grown unused to it... but mostly, it's this sense that connections are made between people because they -have- to be made, because otherwise things won't move forward. not always, but sometimes that's particularly clear. that was my problem with hp, too. things were this way or that way because they -had- to be, in order for all these other things to happen. do human relationships actually work like that? can you look back on the "plot" of your life and see how of -course- you liked or disliked that person, and is there ever this sense of inevitability about it all?
i mean, yes, sometimes things just -are-, instinctual and immediate, but there isn't really a -reason-, no way to actually -explain- it, is there? that's what bothers me, the intricate linkage of explanations all clinking together. not clumsily like in fanfic, where one rails against telling-not-showing, not clumsily at all. less like a writing defect and more like a way of understanding the world as a series of chain-linked connections. it's like in those old anthropology books, i imagine, where they outlined the way to behave among "those people" in order to get "those results", as if people are in some sense predictable and you could kind of play them like a game of chess.
of course, the whole series is a game of chess in more ways than one-- and this doesn't make a bad story at all, in fact plenty of stories (lewis carroll being most obvious) depend on a rigid architecture, all the components in their exact place, playing their exact role. maybe this is what "plotting" is all about, i don't know. but it's been a long few days, and my head hurts, and i could use some chaos right now, i guess. not all stories are like this, but a lot are, i know that-- a lot of the best, even. everything in its place, a ballet of movements all building towards a cascading sets of results that eventually combine to inevitably come together in some sort of finale. without ophelia there would be no hamlet, that sort of thing. funny because in this case, this is a struggle against destiny, in a way, and it's brought about by this intricate set of necessary coindidences. i mean, the very concept hurts my mind, kind of. necessary coincidences.
and by the end, i am holding all this in my head, and the weight of all these inevitable coincidences is mighty indeed. there was some conversation at the beginning of the book about destiny-- and someone questioned the idea of it. it's hard to separate the reality of how everything happens from the eventual goal. you can't really escape destiny if your destiny is to escape it, can you. and if you -have- to make certain connections, and everything kind of depends of this connection being made at this exact time, and you can't make it at any other time, and you -have- to do this-or-that now and not later in order for a 100 other things to be able to happen and link together-- that's just kind of disturbing, isn't it?
( or maybe i'm just disturbed. well, -you- read a story about the end of destiny from waking to dreaming and see if -you- don't start being disturbed. )
i'm not used to things being so intricately plotted-- or maybe i've grown unused to it... but mostly, it's this sense that connections are made between people because they -have- to be made, because otherwise things won't move forward. not always, but sometimes that's particularly clear. that was my problem with hp, too. things were this way or that way because they -had- to be, in order for all these other things to happen. do human relationships actually work like that? can you look back on the "plot" of your life and see how of -course- you liked or disliked that person, and is there ever this sense of inevitability about it all?
i mean, yes, sometimes things just -are-, instinctual and immediate, but there isn't really a -reason-, no way to actually -explain- it, is there? that's what bothers me, the intricate linkage of explanations all clinking together. not clumsily like in fanfic, where one rails against telling-not-showing, not clumsily at all. less like a writing defect and more like a way of understanding the world as a series of chain-linked connections. it's like in those old anthropology books, i imagine, where they outlined the way to behave among "those people" in order to get "those results", as if people are in some sense predictable and you could kind of play them like a game of chess.
of course, the whole series is a game of chess in more ways than one-- and this doesn't make a bad story at all, in fact plenty of stories (lewis carroll being most obvious) depend on a rigid architecture, all the components in their exact place, playing their exact role. maybe this is what "plotting" is all about, i don't know. but it's been a long few days, and my head hurts, and i could use some chaos right now, i guess. not all stories are like this, but a lot are, i know that-- a lot of the best, even. everything in its place, a ballet of movements all building towards a cascading sets of results that eventually combine to inevitably come together in some sort of finale. without ophelia there would be no hamlet, that sort of thing. funny because in this case, this is a struggle against destiny, in a way, and it's brought about by this intricate set of necessary coindidences. i mean, the very concept hurts my mind, kind of. necessary coincidences.
and by the end, i am holding all this in my head, and the weight of all these inevitable coincidences is mighty indeed. there was some conversation at the beginning of the book about destiny-- and someone questioned the idea of it. it's hard to separate the reality of how everything happens from the eventual goal. you can't really escape destiny if your destiny is to escape it, can you. and if you -have- to make certain connections, and everything kind of depends of this connection being made at this exact time, and you can't make it at any other time, and you -have- to do this-or-that now and not later in order for a 100 other things to be able to happen and link together-- that's just kind of disturbing, isn't it?
( or maybe i'm just disturbed. well, -you- read a story about the end of destiny from waking to dreaming and see if -you- don't start being disturbed. )
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